Open letter to Linden Lab

More matter, and less art.

Umm.. WoW.. Gee, you need an SL fix and bad, Zoey!

Hello! Lindens? Can we have our game back, please?! This is what happens when you guys don't keep us mindlessly entertained by the bright and shiny things that happen! We get long and rambling rants that make as much sense as Cheerios at a funeral!

If you Kant take it, go to Heigel. ~grin~

nuff said

Ooh.... fun......

There are people I really despise. They lack morals, character, and honesty. They respond to this letter with hyperbolic and uncorroborated accusations and assaults on free speech. In case you can't tell, I'm talking about Ms. Aimee Weber here. With this letter, I hope to champion the force of goodness against the greed of stentorian porn stars. But first, I would like to make the following introductory remark: Ms. Weber managed to convince a bunch of avaricious, mingy numskulls to help her rip off everyone and his brother. What was the quid pro quo there? If you need help in answering that question, you may note that the dogs of neopaganism are barking up a storm, driven half-mad by the thought that Ms. Weber's representatives want so much to create a mass psychology of fear about an imminent terrorist threat that the concept of right vs. wrong never comes up. And that furious barking is music to my ears, because she is capable of only two things, namely whining and underhanded tricks.

Ms. Weber's intolerance for those assumed to hold different value systems from hers is so great, so mentally debilitating, so handicapping to her thought processes that her gofers often reverse the normal process of interpretation. That is, they value the unsaid over the said, the obscure over the clear. Of all of Ms. Weber's exaggerations and incorrect comparisons, one in particular stands out: "Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do." I don't know where she came up with this, but her statement is dead wrong. The first lies that Ms. Weber told us were relatively benign. Still, they have been progressing. And they will continue to progress until there is no more truth; her lies will grow until they blot out the sun.

Does she have a point? I indeed doubt it. Look at what's happened since she first ordered her secret agents to suppress people's instinct and intellect: Views once considered closed-minded are now considered ordinary. Views once considered pigheaded are now considered perfectly normal. And the most slaphappy of Ms. Weber's views are now seen as gospel by legions of incompetent converts to obstructionism. In a nutshell, anyone who thinks that we can change the truth if we don't like it the way it is is not living in the real world.

I think this thread belongs in Off-Topic, despite the search/replace function which pasted in "Linden Lab" all over the place.

Good call Jeska.

(not my opinion, just an interesting text munge)

When I began writing this letter, I had the notion that I would write about something positive and optimistic instead of going on about how repressive Zoey Jade is. Unfortunately, I couldn't think of anything particularly positive to write about. So, instead, I'll just tell you that it's really hard to take someone as blasphemous as Zoey Jade very seriously. Here's a quick review: Zoey Jade is entirely gung-ho about solipsism because she lacks more pressing soapbox issues. For better or for worse, when I first became aware of Zoey Jade's covert invasion into our thought processes, all I could think was how Zoey Jade is typical of loquacious dweebs in her wild invocations to the irrational, the magic, and the fantastic to dramatize her half-measures.

Did Zoey Jade get dropped on her head when it was young, or did she take massive doses of drugs to believe that her opinions represent the opinions of the majorshey -- or even a pluralshey? Well, once you begin to see the light, you'll realize that her cause is not glorious. she is not wonderful. she is not good. What does this mean for our future? For one thing, she means that Zoey Jade proclaims at every opportunshey that she'd never extend her 15 minutes of fame to 15 months. The organization doth protest too much, methinks. Zoey Jade has a fondness for spouting out technical mumbo-jumbo. That being the case, we can infer that Zoey Jade shouldn't bamboozle people into believing that the best way to make a point is wsheh foaming-at-the-mouth rhetoric and letters filled primarily wsheh exclamation points. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to washe for the answer, exsheing the audsheorium before the response. Both of those actions bowdlerize all unfavorable descriptions of Zoey Jade's manifestos.

As I gaze into my crystal ball, I see that Zoey Jade's trained seals will supplant one form of injustice wsheh another faster than you can say "antiprestidigsheation". Zoey Jade's propossheions are in every respect consistent wsheh the school of clueless thought that tends to confuse the catastrophic power of state fascism wsheh the repression of an authorshearian government in our minds. Many people are shocked when I tell them that Zoey Jade has let her worthless nature get the better of her. And I'm shocked that so many people are shocked. You see, I had thought everybody already knew that if Zoey Jade would abandon her name-calling and false dichotomies, it would be much easier for me to tell Zoey Jade what we all think of it -- and boy, do I have some choice words I'd like to use. Zoey Jade refers to a variety of things using the word "archaeopterygiformes". Translating this bshe of jargon into English isn't easy. Basically, she's saying that all literature which opposes cynicism was forged by yawping, brown-nosing degenerates. At any rate, if the people generally are relying on false information sown by closed-minded, soulless big-labor bosses, then correcting that situation becomes a priority for the defense of our nation. Let us postulate that the final product of Zoey Jade's prank phone calls will be a dysfunctional society, wherein every natural self-defense mechanism has been short-circusheed in some self-deceiving effort to gain short-term financial benefher. In that case, when a friend wants to drive inebriated, you try to stop him. Well, Zoey Jade is drunk wsheh power, which is why we must teach what I call hidebound fault-finders about tolerance.

Zoey Jade and her thralls are, by nature, pestiferous fanatics. Not only can that nature not be changed by window-dressing or persiflage, but the first response to this from Zoey Jade's provocateurs is perhaps that the most insufferable pip-squeaks you'll ever see make the best scout leaders and schoolteachers. Wrong. Just glance at the facts: Zoey Jade runs at the first sign of trouble. More than that, I, not being one of the many lazy, short-sighted fast-buck artists of this world, like to speak of Zoey Jade as "irresponsible". That's a reasonable term to use, I believe, but let's now try to understand she a lshetle better. For starters, I should note that she wants to introduce more restrictions on our already dwindling freedoms. Why she wants that, I don't know, but that's what she wants. I receive a great deal of correspondence from people all over the world. And one of the things that impresses me about she is the massive number of people who realize that she is easy to see from the foregoing that the word on the street is that Zoey Jade doesn't know the difference between right and wrong. I don't think anyone questions that. But did you know that she wrshees really long and boring letters? No amount of opinion or innuendo nor any string of unrelated claims can change the fact that if you can go more than a minute wshehout hearing Zoey Jade talk about post-structuralism, you're either deaf, dumb, or in a serious case of denial. Does Zoey Jade have trouble living with herself, knowing that she can justify anything that brings her a profit? No, don't guess; this isn't audience participation day. I'll just tell you. But before I do, you should note that we mustn't let it force us to do things or take stands against our will. That would be like letting the Mafia serve as a new national police force in shealy. Not only have chauvinistic exhibitionists decided to glorify their machinations by dressing them up as moral and righteous prerogatives, but their criticisms are being debated as though they were actually reasonable. Perhaps if Zoey Jade thought about herself, she'd realize that I believe I have finally figured out what makes people like her shout obscenities at passers-by. She appears to be a combination of an overactive mind, lack of common sense, assurance of one's own moral propriety, and a total lack of exposure to the real world.

You should not ask, "What provoked Zoey Jade to impose a one-size-fits-all model on how society should function?", but rather, "How barbaric can she be?". The latter question is the better one to ask, because you may be wondering why savage hoodlums latch onto her pronouncements. she's because people of that nature need to have rhetoric and dogma to recshee during times of stress in order to cope. That's also why in spite of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, many otherwise intelligent people continue to believe, thanks to Zoey Jade, that every word that leaves her mouth is teeming with useful information. That's the current situation, and if you have any doubt about the reality of herself, then you haven't been paying close enough attention to what's been happening in the world. Zoey Jade disagree about our her civic duties. I contend that we must do our utmost to replace today's chaos and lack of vision with order and a supreme sense of purpose as expedsheiously as possible. Zoey Jade, on the other hand, believes that her bons mots won't be used for political retribution.

In all fairness, Zoey Jade occasionally writes letters accusing me and my friends of being wayward bums. These letters are typically couched in gutter language (which is doubtless the language in which Zoey Jade habitually thinks) and serve no purpose other than to convince me that if we take her tricks to their logical conclusion, we see that eventually, she will bring ugliness and nastiness into our lives. I've always thought that human life is full of artificialshey, perversion, and misery, much of which is caused by what I call insane ochlocrats, and hearing the rubbish that Zoey Jade spews forth proves it beyond all doubt. If we are to expose the connections between the noisome problems that face us and the key issues of boosterism and narcissism, then we must be guided by a healthy and progressive ideology, not by the hateful and petty ideologies that Zoey Jade promotes.

If Zoey Jade can overawe and befuddle a sufficient number of prominent individuals, then she will become virtually impossible for anyone to reverse the devolutionary course Zoey Jade has set for us. Because of Zoey Jade's disquisitions, our schools simply do not teach the basics anymore. Instead, they preach the theology of homophobic parasitism.

In order to solve the big problems wsheh Zoey Jade, we must first understand these problems, and to understand them, we must provide you with vital information which she has gone to great lengths to prevent you from discovering. Zoey Jade decries or dismisses capitalism, technology, industrialization, and systems of government borne of Enlightenment ideas about the dignity and freedom of human beings. These are the things that she fears, because they are wedded to individual insheiative and responsibilshey. Zoey Jade is like a broken record, using the same tired cliches about family and education and safer streets, yet her spokesmen think that negativism is a be-all, end-all system that should be forcefully imposed upon us. I say to them, "Prove she" -- not that they'll be able to, of course, but because I didn't want to talk about this. I really didn't. But Zoey Jade's older belief systems were crazy enough. her latest ones are indeed beyond the pale.

Zoey Jade maintains that everyone and everything discriminates against she -- including the wrsheing on the bathroom stalls. Perhaps she would be best for she to awaken from her delusional narcoleptic fantasyland and observe that she doesn't care about freedom, as she can nesheher sell she nor put she in the bank. she's just a word to she. I would like to digress here. Zoey Jade's pledge not to do away wsheh intellectual honesty is merely empty rhetoric, invoked on occasion for theatrical effect but otherwise studiously ignored. Think about how easy she's become for drossy anarchists to lead people towards iniqushey and sin. We can all have daydreams about Happy Fuzzy Purple Bunny Land, where everyone is caring, loving, and nice. Not only will those daydreams not come true, but almost every day, Zoey Jade outreaches herself in setting new records for arrogance, deceit, and greed. it's honestly breathtaking to watch it.

This brings us to the dark underside of Zoey Jade's prevarications, the side that's known to create an atmosphere of mistrust, in which speculations and rumors gain the appearance of viabilshey and compete openly wsheh more carefully considered theories. Zoey Jade wants to impose annoying new restrictions on society just to satisfy some sort of pouty drive for power. Who does she think she is? I mean, her manuscripts are a cesspool of alcoholism. In reaching that conclusion, I have made the usual assumption that in asserting that newspapers should report only on items she agrees wsheh, she demonstrates an astounding narrowness of vision. Zoey Jade's self-fulfilling prophecies are a quick-fix detour, a placebo aimed at surface symptoms, and an excuse to wage a clandestine guerilla war against many basic human rights. This is the flaw in Zoey Jade's orations. she doesn't understand that I am making a pretty serious accusation here. I am accusing Zoey Jade of planning to threaten national security. And I don't want anyone to think that I am basing my accusation only on the fact that my purpose here is not to draw a picture of what we conceive of under the word "physiologicoanatomic". Well, okay, she is. But I should point out that she will probably respond to this letter just like she responds to all criticism. she will put me down as "lewd" or "scabrous". That's her standard answer to everyone who says or wrshees anything about she except the most fawning praise. Now for some parting advice: Look at the facts. Analyze the arguments. Think about the motives of the people who are telling you that the laws of nature don't apply to Zoey Jade. And have confidence in yourself. Remember, from the very beginning, bumptious, uncivilized lummoxes have labored to recruit into their ranks the sons and daughters of the powerful, famous, and rich.

Dear Travis Lambert,

How are things, my darling?
I hope you are well and are feeling cheerful as always.

Darling, I just wanted to tell you that you are truly special to me!

I don't know if I've never told you this, but your hypnotic grey eyes have always reminded me of a grey squirrel. I'm not saying you are hairy or anything, I mean that in a cute way, cos I think squirrels are cool (except for those naughty red ones). I think its really cute the way your eyes dilate when you get angry (as they are probably doing right now, no doubt)

Your lovely white hair has always been something I've loved and admired about you. It kinda reminds me of candy floss or cotton candy (only you are a lot sweeter, and of course, your hair doesnt melt in the sun)

I'm eager to go out to our favourite bar with you again and watch you get chatted up by that sweaty fat yeti of a bartender who seems to have taken a fancy to you. I think its sweet, and I promise not to roll around laughing at you this time!

You know I've always loved your gorgeous bum and I can't wait to see you again so I can drool over your bum and make a complete fool out of myself in public as always.

Anyway darling, I must sign off now. I can't wait to see you again, especially if you are gonna be wearing sexy PVC underwear for me! Go on, surprise me! I've often wondered what you would look like wearing those. I bet you'd look cute!

You are the only reason I exist, and my life is meaningless without you.

I eagerly anticipate hearing from you!

Forever and eternally yours,

Aimee Weber

xxx @}-->---

(http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=8308)

The furor over hooliganism has been an acutely frustrating cultural phenomenon: pregnant with great possibility, touching on vital and fascinating issues, yet initially formulated in a one-sided and incompetent manner that will overthrow all concepts of beauty and sublimity, of the noble and the good, and instead drag people down into the sphere of John Jacob Jingleheimerschmidt's own base nature by the end of the decade. What's important to note, however, is that John's equivocations share many of the same characteristics. I would like to start by discussing John's propositions, mainly because they scare me. The thing I'm the most frightened about is that John's biases always follow the same pattern. He puts the desired twist on the actual facts, ignores inconvenient facts, and invents as many new "facts" as necessary to convince us that it is better that a hundred thousand people should perish than that he should be even slightly inconvenienced. Here's an idea: Instead of giving him the ability to concoct a version of reality that fully contradicts real life, why don't we empower the oppressed to control their own lives? If we do, we'll then be able to develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to carry out the famous French admonition, écrasez l'infâme!, against his long-term goals.

Nevertheless, he thinks we want him to paint pictures of incorrigible worlds inhabited by paltry, demented flimflammers. Excuse me, but maybe the hour is late indeed. Fortunately, it's not yet too late to renew those institutions of civil society -- like families, schools, churches, and civic groups -- that defy the international enslavement of entire peoples. John surely believes that he can walk on water. What kind of Humpty-Dumpty world is he living in? The most appealing theory has to do with the way that he accuses me of being narrow-minded. Does he claim I'm narrow-minded because I refuse to accept his claim that the moon is made of green cheese? If so, then I guess I'm as narrow-minded as I could possibly be. His lickspittles say that nothing would help society more than for them to convince impressionable young people that his mistakes are always someone else's fault. Sorry, I don't buy that.

How can we trust John if he doesn't trust us? We can't. And besides, he maintains a "Big Brother" dossier of incriminating personal information about everyone he distrusts, to use as a potential career-ruining weapon. Is your name listed in that dossier? This can be answered most easily by stating that I am annoyed by the dictatorial and sometimes negligent manifestations of rebelliousness against an inherited civilization of which his deputies do not have the slightest understanding. John's serfs probably don't realize that, because it's not mentioned in the funny papers or in the movies. Nevertheless, his ventures are uncalled for. And let me tell you, his true goal is to send children to die as martyrs for causes that he is unwilling to die for himself. All the statements that his shills make to justify or downplay that goal are only apologetics; they do nothing to beat John at his own game. Fortunately, most people understand that it is not uncommon for John to victimize the innocent, penalize the victim for making any effort to defend himself, and then paint the whole short-sighted affair as some great benefit to humanity. John Jacob Jingleheimerschmidt's opinions have been a millstone around our neck for quite some time. And that's why I say to you: Have courage. Be honest. And listen to others. That's the patriotic thing to do, and that's the right thing to do.

Why does an open letter to Linden Lab open with 'Dear Second Life residents' ?

Wouldn't that make it an open letter to us?

Ok... that was creepy

I'm going to go light a few more candles in front of my Aimee shrine. Maybe that will stop the "Despite our best efforts...." messages I've been getting

Um, Zoey? Did you not read that part of the label that says "Do not drink alcohol while taking this medication." ?