James Miller Taxi Co

I'd love to tell you all a story about my favorite cab driver, Harry, but you'll have to catch me in a mature sim.

A little advice, don't hover five freet away from someone who's trying to read the events calendar. The engine revving, the hugeness, the proximity... it's a little off-putting. Believe me, when I was developing my own "jet pack," I got plenty of noise complaints.

I actually hate the noise my cab makes as well. I am going to ask Bosozoku to get rid of it, or give me a command to shut it off, cause, its very annoying. I actually play with my sound off because of it

Well, I have my own cab story now.

I was hanging out in Dore last night at one of the newbie events - being a newbie myself, you know - when out from the sky came a floating yellow submarine. James himself was about to land near Stage 4. I could hear the engines roaring as he settled the cab next to the meeting, which had just ended. It seems to me James knew exactly when to show up...

He hopped out and asked if anyone wanted a ride. I of course had to check this thing out.

"Can you take me to the Sandbox?" I asked. I had intended to spend my last few SL minutes of the evening learning how to build with SL's quirky little toolset. I'd heard the Sandbox was the place to practice. You don't lose any money that way, they say.

"Sure, hop in," replied James. "L$10 to Sandbox."

It is important to note that the trip would have cost me well over L$20 via direct teleport. New folks like myself tend to be on a tight budget. The cab is a godsend.

Mentor Nyna was having a Mad Libs event and mentioned that she was hoping I'd stay for it, so I asked James if he could just fly me to Sandbox and back. I really needed to see what the big fuss was about these taxis. Nyna's event wouldn't start for a few minutes yet, so I wouldn't miss anything.

My interface was acting wacky (ever since the sim had been similarly acting up - we lost Dore a few times last night) so I was having trouble getting into the cab and sitting down.

"Please have a seat, sir," said James. "There you go, whoops, no...just sit on the...wait, you gotta...there you...oops, nope...try getting out and back in...Justice! Just right click on the...ok you're in...whoops, no..!"

Finally I was seated, too petrified to move lest James boot me out of the cab in frustration. Newbies! I'm really not that squirmy in First Life. Honest. And I can't jump that high, either. It's a very good thing the cab has no ceiling. Fortunately the cabbie was patient.

Off we went. Whoosh, into the sky like a gigantic bungling banana. Hoopla, the magic bus! Though,
to be honest, the thing sounds more like a Dodge Viper chugging down the freeway at 75mph, idling in 5th gear. It's noisy.

You can actually have a light discussion with your cabbie as you fly. English is generally his first language (or a close second!) and somehow he can control the cab and carry on a bit of conversation all at the same time.

The cab slows down at sim crossings, and I can't remember the exact reason James gave me for this. It had something to do with bugs in the game. "Linden bugs," he called them. He might have been
referring to something else - who knows? ;o)

It was a great time. All good things must come to an end, however. Something awful (and yet ultimately wonderful) happened just then.

Imagine yourself cruising in an airship at 30,000 feet. You're looking out the window, enjoying the view and chatting about inconsequential things. Life is good. Suddenly, the airship you're riding in disappears entirely right out from underneath you. There is a Wile E. Coyote moment as you hang there in mid air - you can pratically see the exclamation point appear over your head. And then you are falling, arms flailing, to the ground. Very fast.

Apparently James was just as stunned as I was, because neither he nor I remembered we could get out of this terrible situation by tapping the fight key and thus saving ourselves from smacking headlong into the dirt. You'd think James would be quicker than I, a mere newbie, at hitting the 'F' key. Alas, nope. We went into the ground like friggin' lawn darts.

No big, yellow cab to be seen - just two stunned, dirty, broken dorks laying face down on the ground
in the middle of nowhere...

...I do not think I have ever laughed harder in my life. Really. I normally do two sets of crunches before I shower in the mornings. I did not need to do any this morning. A few more trips like that and I will have abs of steel.

James got up and scratched his head.

"Perry's bugged," he said. "That always happens here."

He had a spare cab, much to my relief. Unfortunately, he couldn't get it started. I was about to start recommending standard vehicular troubleshooting steps, but thought better of it. What in the hell do I know about virtual cabs? This isn't a '68 Mustang, you know?

James called one of the Lindens. Handy people, those Lindens. I'm willing to bet they all wear those mechanic's jumpsuits and carry wrenches in First Life. It only took a few seconds for a Linden to show up in Second Life. And I'm not positive, but I think it was great grandaddy Linden himself. Are they clones? Freaks of nature? Ghosts in The Machine? Probably.

Now that's what I call roadside assistance. Mr. Linden closed the hood and ushered us on our way.

Woosh, off we went again. To Sandbox and Beyond! The rest of the trip was uneventful. Sandbox was nifty but barren, so we didn't stick around. I made it back to Mad Libs just in time to see Darwin Appleby type out the longest words in the English language, and call them nouns. Darwin, even if they were not nouns, we wouldn't have noticed anyway.

Like I said, the rest of the trip was uneventful. That's exactly what you'd hope for when you ride in a cab, though. You don't want events. They are generally Bad Things.

I will tell you this, though. If you decide to take a cab, and I hope you do (you will have a great time, get somewhere quickly, and save money), make sure you tell your cabbie to stop off somewhere in Perry along the way. The experience of falling out of a suddenly-disappearing cab at 30k feet is not one to be missed. Especially if your cabbie falls with you, in tandem, and in formation. You'll turn into a skydiving duo practically instantaneously.

It's an even better experience than Skeedalee's Chicken Shooter, which is quite a compliment indeed!

James, your cab business is superb. I will use it again, and I recommend it to everyone. There is, quite simply, no better way to get around.

Alek Wu's catapult notwithstanding.

-J

LOL Awesome story

Justice, that was a HOOT!

Great article Excellent

Thanks for a bit of exercise for my OWN abdomen!


I can just SEE you guys looking at each other whith that deer-in-the-headlights look as you plumetted toward the ground.

Great story Justice!!
And James, don't get rid of the taxi's chugs, that is part of the charm.

If you missed it Im bored.

Sounds interisting, good story too.

Whatever happened to the cabs? They'd be fun to see flying around. They'd be more for entertainment now days, but still would be fun.

Wow, this thread is *so* old.

I stopped the taxi service long, long ago. It wasn't profitable and the vehicles would constantly dump all the avatars out, especially when entering Perry and Clara. So, I gave up.

Boy, It is hard to believe that was 7 months ago. It sure brings back some fun memories.

* reminds self to look at the dates of postings *