you don't like what you're reading in the forums?

this is true, and it would be good for people to keep that in mind when they try to squash what they percieve as noise.

one could also try to take the other's point of view.
one could sit on one's hands for a day before responding to something that upsets you.
one could increase the signal part of the signal to noise ratio.
one could talk about what one wants to talk about.

ignoring someone is a device that helps to focus attention on what one wants, not what one doesn't want.

this is true, and it would be good for people to keep that in mind when they try to squash what they perceive as squashing.

ymmv. that's the important thing.

One has no obligation to take another's view, especially when another's view posits anyone who disagrees with it is somehow 'bad' or 'wrong' or 'wrong thinking'.

One who states a strong disapproval is stating merely that. The assumption of emotional state is irrelevent but for telling on the part of the one making it.

One who uses analogies should be equally willing to admit there is a point beyond which they fail.

Ignoring someone is a means by which to remove that which is deemed worthless. It is very precisely an act that accords merit or assigns a lacking thereof. It is a personal choice and not subject to the judgement of others.

It is not about holding hands and singing 'Kum Ba Yah'. It is about claiming personal responsibility and taking control of one's enjoyment.

One may make all manner of soft-spoken 'can't we all just get along' posts one wishes, it will not change the reality that 'everyone getting along' falls slightly short of impossible on the scale, and thus, more realistic choices tend to be more attractive.

As you say, your mileage may vary.

there is no obligation. but it is something one could do. humans are not without choice. thus, there are more choices than ignoring.

in a social situation, that emotional state is irrelevant is difficult to give credence.

sometimes the value of a thing can be redeemed when viewed from a different angle. things don't simply exist out there in the world, particularly social things, they are in part constructed of how one views them against one's internal landscape.

pretending all is good is just a much a delusion as saying there is no choice. but one can choose among many choices - some better than others.

it isn't about "can't we all agree". it's more about choosing something more productive than spitting on each other verbally.

I am intrigued by your attempt to argue with me without arguing with me.

But only briefly.

Decent post StoneSelf..

I actually agree with most of what you state. Except that shunning is a bad thing, but that is honestly for me a topic unto itself.

One of the *straw breaks camels back* things that made me leave SL for a while was a few people in the forums. I have a really hard time ignoring people, yet I'm simple with my words. So I can't always fight back against people that use large words and confusion to make their "opposers" look bad. I got hurt by many things that were said. Even things that were not said to me, but to/about others. And I just didn't feel I had the words to express what I felt needed to be said. So, I left.

Drama, strife, sadness, hard times.. to me these are all just as much a part of our Second Life as they are our first. We decide what to do with these lives based on the things, people, etc. that we encounter. Some people need to just step back. Rather than let themselves be sucked into a swirl of mess that will only end up making them unhappy. I don't want the "bad people" to go away. Without them we would have no "good".

But at the same time, I agree that sometimes it is better to just walk away, ignore, or pretend something isn't there. In the long run, you will probably not feel as bad, and you come out looking better.

Life is way too short to spend it on bitterness. Instead of reading long rambling monologues from babbling idiots I took the practical approach and am now using the ignore button. I am a better person now and feel much better about myself.

It's good to have you back Pen

Honest questions, perhaps not objective, but at least sincere:

Is ignoring people the same as silencing them?

If one makes an individual decision to ignore a person, perhaps it isn't "silencing" them. Many individual decisions to ignore a person cannot be said to "silence" them. Is this true or false?

However, if there is a conscious discussion among many people toward achieving a community consensus to ignore someone, perhaps that is "silencing" them. Something akin to the "tyranny of the majority" may threaten here. Is this true or false?
____________________________

An opinion: Someone on these forums defended the historical practice of "shunning". It can't be defended. It may be legal, but it is unethical, cruel, and sets dangerous precedents, for the groups who do it, for the person or people who endure it, and for the community that allows it.

I've learned to how to read a certain person's posts. I've learned to skim across all the paranoid fantasies about FICisms and Sovietisms and decline-and-fall-of-western-civilization-isms, and pick out the occasional worthwhile observation... and there are a few. I do it quickly, and as I do it, I imagine water rolling off a duck's back in the sunlight. A very beautiful thing to see, btw.

That's how I handle it. Others may choose different strategies, or choose not to handle it at all. My point is, the alternatives are not only "let him go on and on and on," or "let us ignore him." There are other tactics for individuals to consider.

edited to change a phrase for clarity

Hi, Seth! Did you ever get any textures or anything put on that huge-ass plywood flower in Stump?

I'm sure you're feeling quite facile, chipper, and superior today, Seth! Filleting out Prokofy...hmmm...a little Western civ there...a little FIC there...

If it wasn't such an inside joke, I'd call up Harper's magazine and ask them to do an index. I'd ask them to google up how many times I ever used the word FIC or discussed it since I first invented it in the "King Kong in the Water" thread.

Then I'd ask them to google up how many times everybody else used it, plus documented all their t-shirts, asshats, clubs, conceptual art installations, and even a Ham column.

I have no doubt it's going to look something like this:

Number of Times Prokofy Neva Used the Word FIC: 27

Number of Times Forum Posters Used the Word FIC: 1,892

Without being able to see me, you can't galvanize that extra je ne sais quoi of smug superiority!

What's funny is that when you ignore me, I can still see you. So if you ever post any kind of original thought -- or even a mediocre exposition of some sort -- I can respond. Others in the community will see me responding. I'll get the best of you that way because you won't be able to fight back, not seeing it. You'll have to come out of shun mode to work it.

Honestly, I don't think this shun thing is going to work so well for you all.

No. The person can go on postng. Nobody is stopping them.


It's still the same. Nobody is stopping that person from posting.


It's still the same. But now there's a public discussion about not feeding the trolls, and that makes the trolls feel important, so why do it? It won't work anyways because there's always somebody who answers the trolling posts.

Does it make you feel big to make others feel small?

Because honestly, when you step out from behind that magnifying glass, you come back to the same world that we all live in.

Sometimes, yes.

But setting someone on "Ignore" can be a useful self defense mechanism too. If you find yourself wasting a lot of time in the forums, arguing with someone with whom it is pointless to argue, the Ignore button is a good way to reclaim some of your time. Its kind of like putting the cookies away so you won't eat them. Out of sight, out of mind, and get on with your day.

So it isn't necessarily an "act", "tool", "weapon" or "technique". Its merely a way to tune out somebody who aggravates you so that you won't constantly be tempted to speak up and say something you will regret.


Buster

no. but starting a campaign etc. is not the same as simply ignoring them.

hmm... depends on the group dynamic.

still depends on the group dynamic.

welcome back.

Groups are made of individuals. There's no hive mind at work here.

i'm not suggesting a hive mind, but groups have emergent properties not present in individuals, and individuals in groups act differently than individuals alone.

It wasn't a huge-ass plywood flower, Prokofy. I'd like to say it's a huge-ass duck with big-ass water droplets rolling off its back, but it's not that, either. It's a zeppelin. No, it's not finished yet. I don't get much time inworld, unfortunately. But go take a look, there's a lot to see.

Oh, and your point about using the FIC anacronym since you invented it in the King Kong thread is probably a good one. I've noticed that many other people use it far more than you do.

There's that duck again.... Have a nice day!

I don't mean the zeppelin -- geez, I wouldn't confuse a thing like that! I mean the flower...tree...something without plywood that stuck up for weeks out there...

If you spent less time on the forums, you'd have more time for the in-world stuff : )



Yeah. Glad you noticed.

I agree Prok. That's why, as much as I can't stomach half of what you write, I would never, ever put you on mute. Never.

Besides, one man's (or woman's) downfall is my entertainment.

Have a nice day!

Thank you Prokofy... that was the best, side-splitter I've enjoyed in weeks.. maybe even months.