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So who got busted by there RL partner?

Enabran Templar
Capitalist Pig
Join date: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 4,506
08-19-2005 10:21
From: Kendra Bancroft
hahahahahah THAT was great! Thanks for providing me with my new sig :)


/me bows

Thank you, I guess my reading of some hardboiled detective stories came at a pretty opportune time. :)

Don't miss Part I:

From: Enabran Templar
ENABRAN TEMPLAR, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR


It was one of those nasty nights in Bonifacio. Lag so thick it washed the slime off the sidewalk outside my office. I was tired. It was quitting time. The stink of old cigars and self-importance hung in the room like a bad toupe on a bald, splotchy skull.

Just as I reached out to turn off my low-prim desk lamp, she came to the door. I knew at once I wasn't alone -- my already pitiful framerate dropped even further into the murky toilet where it seemed to live. She let herself in, not even bothering to knock, her demure face expressionless as she fixed her gaze on me. Her prim hair glistened in the moonlight and I counted no less than three thousand red-brown, cut, twisted, hollowed, shiny torii, writhing like metallic snakes emerging from the head of a digital Medusa.

But she was no Medusa...
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From: Hiro Pendragon
Furthermore, as Second Life goes to the Metaverse, and this becomes an open platform, Linden Lab risks lawsuit in court and [attachment culling] will, I repeat WILL be reverse in court.


Second Life Forums: Who needs Reason when you can use bold tags?
Dianne Mechanique
Back from the Dead
Join date: 28 Mar 2005
Posts: 2,648
08-19-2005 10:36
From: Misty Rhodes
Well Hiro there is a whole other side to you. I want to see more of your writing ....WOW Its so reminded me of Sin City.

Great Thread!
Waaay better than Sin City IMO.

SinCity puts the boots to true Noir monologue.
If it were not for the visuals I would have fallen asleep in that movie.

:)
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black
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Memory Harker
Girl Anachronism
Join date: 17 Jun 2005
Posts: 393
Color Me Impressed
08-19-2005 10:39
:D :D :D

Threads like this, it's almost as if S. J. Perelman were still alive. What beautiful, funny parodies!
Enabran Templar
Capitalist Pig
Join date: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 4,506
08-19-2005 10:39
/me waits for Hiro to give proper attribution for his repost of Enabran's content. ;)
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From: Hiro Pendragon
Furthermore, as Second Life goes to the Metaverse, and this becomes an open platform, Linden Lab risks lawsuit in court and [attachment culling] will, I repeat WILL be reverse in court.


Second Life Forums: Who needs Reason when you can use bold tags?
Ingrid Ingersoll
Archived
Join date: 10 Aug 2004
Posts: 4,601
08-19-2005 10:54
From: Rose Karuna
According to my Ingersol watch, its five o’clock, he should have been here by now, sighing, I stood up, waiting for the griefer and the inevitable nauseating spin into the next SIM. Instead, a tall, rather gaunt gentleman, sporting an exclusive Midnight suit and open black raincoat walked into the greenhouse.


Are you implying something? There is nothing going on between Cristiano and I. Those pictures were fabricated. :p
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Nyx Divine
never say never!
Join date: 11 Dec 2004
Posts: 1,052
08-19-2005 11:32
*applauds wildly*

Good stuff U guys :)
Forseti Svarog
ESC
Join date: 2 Nov 2004
Posts: 1,730
08-19-2005 12:09
Washed up. That’s how I felt – like a fifty-cent dish cloth put through the wringer just one too many times. She’d put one over on me once again, this time shacking up with a spiky-haired monkey with biceps like two meter spheres. The guy hadn’t even changed the plywood. Classy.

Now I paraded from one dime-an-hour PI to another. These offices were all the same -- the same plastic wood siding, smoke particle curling to the ceiling, targetOmega fans spinning too lazily to move the air, and windows which bled grey and barely stopped the rain that was now cascading over the brim of my fedora.

It was always raining in this wreck of a town. But I needed that now. I needed the repetitive droning of that mind-numbing rain. I needed it to wash away the stench of Johnny Walker that bled out of every pore. She would be pissed. I hadn’t touched the sauce in fifteen years. Fifteen years she’d been playing me for a fool while she chased her tail with every blingtard ken doll in town.

Her town.

This was the place. Concrete steps and an iron railing listing at 13 degrees. Prim fence, not texture -- interesting.

The faded linoleum didn’t inspire confidence, but I was years past a winning deal anyway and this was the last red beacon before I had to log into the darkness of cable modem downtime. One last beacon – maybe one last chance. I didn’t know what lay inside. Redemption? Revenge? Or another wasted chance for a wasted fool like me.

The sign read, “ENABRAN TEMPLAR, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR”
Enabran Templar
Capitalist Pig
Join date: 26 Aug 2004
Posts: 4,506
08-19-2005 12:12
Forseti wins. That one was the best.

Bravo! :D
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From: Hiro Pendragon
Furthermore, as Second Life goes to the Metaverse, and this becomes an open platform, Linden Lab risks lawsuit in court and [attachment culling] will, I repeat WILL be reverse in court.


Second Life Forums: Who needs Reason when you can use bold tags?
Forseti Svarog
ESC
Join date: 2 Nov 2004
Posts: 1,730
08-19-2005 12:15
From: Enabran Templar
Forseti wins. That one was the best.

Bravo! :D


hahah not at all! yours (both of them) and everyone's was so much fun. But ushu said we needed a male cuckold... so I figured i would oblige :)

this was fun! kind of like a written version of nylon and toasts freestyle drawing in the Gallery forum. Keep it up!
Ingrid Ingersoll
Archived
Join date: 10 Aug 2004
Posts: 4,601
08-19-2005 12:19
Sam Spade
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Siggy Romulus
DILLIGAF
Join date: 22 Sep 2003
Posts: 5,711
08-19-2005 12:25
I prefer 'Tracer Bullet'
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The Second Life forums are living proof as to why it's illegal for people to have sex with farm animals.

From: Jesse Linden
I, for one, am highly un-helped by this thread
Maxx Monde
Registered User
Join date: 14 Nov 2003
Posts: 1,848
08-19-2005 12:27
Easy there, ingrid - you're about one upload short of 0 L$.

*stomps out cigarette, leaving the fog-swirled cone of the streetlamp...*
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Ushuaia Tokugawa
Nobody of Consequence
Join date: 22 Mar 2005
Posts: 268
08-19-2005 12:52
From: Forseti Svarog

But ushu said we needed a male cuckold... so I figured i would oblige :)


Forseti, thank you for helping me take a stand against this tide of reverse sexism we seem to be weathering here recently. ;) I bet you don't wear pink shirts either, do you?
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Newfie Pendragon
Crusty and proud of it
Join date: 19 Dec 2003
Posts: 1,025
08-19-2005 12:55
This run-down, one-cpu town had a way of getting into your inventory, rotting away at your insides like an asset-server crashing, deleting one's hopes and dreams as easily as it did that wood-textured sphere bean-bag chair you bought at last week's yard sale. The neighbours look at your run-down unlinked mess of a house with disgusted eyes, their Tommy Hillprimmer shoes swaying as they ride their Pony Linden.

But you dont get to ride the Pony Linden. You fell off that avatar years ago. Now you're just a washed-up agent, single-digit UUID betraying your age. "No-good lifer," they yell at you. "Go back to your free plot and stay there." Some free plot. The bright shiny masses terraformed that plot into your grave - and you were still in it when the bulldozer rolled past.

It always rains here. You rezzed for yourself a life of ruin, and your prim limit is used up. Living from stipend to stipend, unable to buy your bling, your avatar clothed in rotted library textures. You try to grab that great money ball in the sky, but it's just a money tree. And you're no newbie.

Then again, distraught housewives needing you to do a job on their partners regularly sway their overstretched chest-textures at you. Some say under those skirts is a guy with a fantasy, but you dont care. Pixels are pixels, and Lindens are Lindens. You're a PI. You'll never see under that skirt anyways.
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Cindy Claveau
Gignowanasanafonicon
Join date: 16 May 2005
Posts: 2,008
08-19-2005 13:54
Omigod. I used to write stuff like this for fun -- I stand in awe of this entire thread. Well done. It takes a certain disregard for taste to come up with such clever metaphors -- taking my Torrid's Block Hat off to you all /bow

What'd be fun if enough were interested: Start a round-robin story over in Off Topic. One sets the stage, leaves the story hanging in a couple of paragraphs, another picks it up. See where it goes after 14 people contribute.

Last one like that I did, we started out in New York and ended up hiding behind a potted plant in Bangkok while stalking a hooker disguised as Groucho Marx.
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Jonquille Noir
Lemon Fresh
Join date: 17 Jan 2004
Posts: 4,025
08-19-2005 14:38
From: Siggy Romulus
I prefer 'Tracer Bullet'


I had 4 slugs in me.. 1 was lead and 3 were bourbon..
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Little Rebel Designs
Gallinas
FlipperPA Peregrine
Magically Delicious!
Join date: 14 Nov 2003
Posts: 3,703
08-19-2005 18:36
From: Jonquille Noir
I had 4 slugs in me.. 1 was lead and 3 were bourbon..


Women who drink whiskey, bourbon and scotch are VERY sexy.

John Cleese: Care for a drink?
Jamie Lee Curtis: Whiskey...
John Cleese: You are the sexiest woman I have ever met in my entire life.
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Maenad Grant
is probably Dr. Funk
Join date: 27 Jun 2005
Posts: 28
Oh mah God...
08-23-2005 03:23
From: Seldon Metropolitan
this thread makes me want to buy a sim just to build a giant city in all greyscale.....get some lonely saxophone wailing in the background...


Just when I think I couldn't love you any more... you say something like this. <3
Stephane Zugzwang
Brat
Join date: 26 Jun 2004
Posts: 192
08-23-2005 06:34
I would contribute land to a "Noir" Sim.
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Stephane Zugzwang
--
To see a world in a grain of sand and heaven in a wild flower
Hold infinity in the palms of your hand and eternity in an hour
Seldon Metropolitan
Zen Taxi Driver
Join date: 20 Jun 2005
Posts: 376
08-23-2005 06:38
From: Maenad Grant
Just when I think I couldn't love you any more... you say something like this. <3

<3 :)

I'd actually love to do this at some point. sell avatars in all greyscale, with maybe little flashes of color ala sin city. need money/time tho.

oh, and only if I can convince Templar, PI to set up shop ;)
Jake Reitveld
Emperor of Second Life
Join date: 9 Mar 2005
Posts: 2,690
08-23-2005 12:22
Midnight city people, for gods sakes midnight city.
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ALCHEMY -clothes for men.

Lebeda 208,209
Foulcault Mechanique
Father Cheesemonkey
Join date: 28 Mar 2005
Posts: 557
08-23-2005 12:33
From: Jake Reitveld
Midnight city people, for gods sakes midnight city.


NO! To much color...must be black and white. I saw a pink dot in there yesturday. LOL
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Foulcault
"Keep telling yourself that and someday you just might believe it."

"Every Technomage knows the 14 words that will make someone fall in love with you forever, but she only needed one.
"Hello""
Galen from Babylon 5 Crusade

From: Jeska Linden
I'm moving this over to Off-Topic for further Pez ruminations.
Seldon Metropolitan
Zen Taxi Driver
Join date: 20 Jun 2005
Posts: 376
08-23-2005 13:11
midnight city is gorgeous. but its not the black and white noir city of my dreams.
Catherine Cotton
Tis Elfin
Join date: 2 Apr 2003
Posts: 3,001
08-23-2005 13:24
From: Frostie Flora
Husband: Mmmmm...hot hot pixel action,

Wife: HONEY i'm back from my sister- O_O

Husband: ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK!!

Wife: Waaahhh!!! My husband is doing Pixelated moobs and coochies!!!!! Time to go to my sister's and cry and eat chocolate and write to some editorial about my husband being a two timeing jerk!!!!!1111one!!11one11twoonetwo!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ahem, I know this is a serious problem to some people,
but to me, : HAHAHHA haaahhahaahha....hahahahahahaaha...OMG...LOLZ LMAO....

Okay i'm done,


Rofl uh huh :D
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Jake Reitveld
Emperor of Second Life
Join date: 9 Mar 2005
Posts: 2,690
08-23-2005 13:51
From: Seldon Metropolitan
midnight city is gorgeous. but its not the black and white noir city of my dreams.


well you monitors color adjustments can fix that. :) All of sl in greyscale.
look at the gams on that tomato!
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ALCHEMY -clothes for men.

Lebeda 208,209
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