Jeska Linden: Go, Baby, Go!
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Lecktor Hannibal
YOUR MOM
Join date: 1 Jul 2004
Posts: 6,734
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09-23-2005 15:18
OMFG I am not worthy, I am not worthy. This deserves a *STICKY* 
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YOUR MOM says, 'Come visit us at SC MKII http://secondcitizen.net ' From: Khamon Fate Oh, Lecktor, you're terrible. Bikers have more fun than people !
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Torley Linden
Enlightenment!
Join date: 15 Sep 2004
Posts: 16,530
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09-23-2005 15:18
Julian, you've been on a comedy goldrun. Keep on dropping nuggets! |
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Lecktor Hannibal
YOUR MOM
Join date: 1 Jul 2004
Posts: 6,734
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09-23-2005 15:19
From: Torley Torgeson Julian, you've been on a comedy goldrun. Keep on dropping nuggets! Nuggets hell, that was a vein. 
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YOUR MOM says, 'Come visit us at SC MKII http://secondcitizen.net ' From: Khamon Fate Oh, Lecktor, you're terrible. Bikers have more fun than people !
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David Valentino
Nicely Wicked
Join date: 1 Jan 2004
Posts: 2,941
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09-23-2005 16:35
From: Julian Fate Me too. It's easy to project all kinds of implied content in her posts. Note that I say "project".
Come on, people, don't bring up policy inconsistencies in a Modmas discussion. That's like talking about a kid's report card on Christmas day. Also, it makes you a target when the Modmas festivities begin.
The Night Before Modmas
'Twas the night before Modmas, when all 'cross the board
Not a creature was flaming, not even one word.
The questions and comments were crafted with care,
In hopes that some Linden soon would post there.
The posters were nestled all snug in their threads,
While visions of five-star votes danced in their heads.
And I in my office, scootched down in my seat,
Had just settled in for a long comfy read.
Wow! Wonderful Julian! Comedy gold all the way!!
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David Lamoreaux
Owner - Perilous Pleasures and Extreme Erotica Gallery
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Cocoanut Koala
Coco's Cottages
Join date: 7 Feb 2005
Posts: 7,903
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09-23-2005 16:52
From: Julian Fate Me too. It's easy to project all kinds of implied content in her posts. Note that I say "project".
Come on, people, don't bring up policy inconsistencies in a Modmas discussion. That's like talking about a kid's report card on Christmas day. Also, it makes you a target when the Modmas festivities begin.
The Night Before Modmas
'Twas the night before Modmas, when all 'cross the board
Not a creature was flaming, not even one word.
The questions and comments were crafted with care,
In hopes that some Linden soon would post there.
The posters were nestled all snug in their threads,
While visions of five-star votes danced in their heads.
And I in my office, scootched down in my seat,
Had just settled in for a long comfy read.
When out of my browser there rose such a screech,
Like a swamp skinny-dipper who just found the first leech.
For the keyboard and mouse I reached in great fear,
Hit Reload and Maximize and what did I hear?
A howl of cold laughter that made my blood burn,
And a shudder that ran through each forum in turn.
The background was black now and the font it was red,
With dark "New Posts" icons shaped like severed heads!
They popped up so fast, like bubbles in Fresca,
I knew right away that it must be St. Jeska.
Like rampaging hippoes her replies they came,
And she laughed as they'd plead and be banned just the same.
"Banned: flamer! Banned: namer!
Banned: repost! Banned: FIC!
Banned: AR-abuser!
Banned: race-bait! Banned: dick!
From the top of Announcements,
To Today's Birthdays! (lol),
Go post on Fark, post on Fark,
Post on Fark all!"
As anti-intellectual cockroaches scuttle,
When faced with a pseudo-intellectual rebuttal,
So out of the forums the posters they flew,
Helped along the way by Jeska's right shoe.
Then in my thread I stopped what I was doing,
For suddenly appeared at the bottom: (2 viewing).
As I hastened to edit my off-topic tone,
Into my post Jeska leapt all alone.
She was dressed all in words, from her head to her feet,
Her necklace was smilies but her eyes said "delete".
She had tasteful prim hair and a Nomine tan,
But she looked like a whup-ass vendor opening a free can.
Her bling jewelry, how it sparkled! Her dimples, how merry!
Her twitching trigger finger on the delete button was scary!
She carried a purse, in itself not so silly,
But it wasn't Gucci or Liz, it was made out of billy!
She paused to edit certain poster's occupations,
Titles and avatars, names and locations,
Sig quotes and PM's and shout-outs to mates,
To include things illegal in 49 states.
She was perky and bright, a right jolly young mod,
And I smiled when I saw her (but still prayed to God).
A wink of her eye and a flip of her head,
Did nothing to quiet the feeling of dread.
She deleted my old posts and went straight to work,
Posting in my name, "I'm a kitten ****ing jerk."
She switched my avatar to goatse and looked up askance,
"Did you think being an ass-kiss would spare you? No chance!"
She brewed up a molotov, set the servers on fire,
Hacked the power grid and sent a massive jolt down my wire,
But I heard her exclaim, err my monitor died,
"Merry Modmas to all, and to all a good night!" Total and pure genius. coco |
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Snowcrash Hoffman
Digital mind virus
Join date: 30 Jan 2005
Posts: 282
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09-23-2005 17:04
From: Julian Fate
The Night Before Modmas
"
WOW! |
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Julian Fate
80's Pop Star
Join date: 19 Oct 2003
Posts: 1,020
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09-25-2005 12:11
Aww, thanks, guys.  |
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Pendari Lorentz
Senior Member
Join date: 5 Sep 2003
Posts: 4,372
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09-25-2005 12:17
haha! This thread so has to be bumped at Christmas time!!
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*hugs everyone*
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Julian Fate
80's Pop Star
Join date: 19 Oct 2003
Posts: 1,020
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09-25-2005 13:19
From: SuezanneC Baskerville Elucidate please. From a list of sci-fi cliches: A Big Surprise awaits the reader/viewer at the end of the tale:
The Barbaric Society is really post-cataclysmic Western civilization.
The man and woman who flee from a doomed civilization and start rebuilding on the third planet of a medium-sized yellow star are named Adam and Eve. The whole "last survivors of a nuclear war turn out to be named Adam and Eve" theme is practically a genre in itself. The Twilight Zone used it, as well as many many movies, books, and pulp stories. The idea being, civilization as we know it rose from the ashes of a nuclear war and now (1940's-1960's) we're about to blow ourselves up again. |
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Intent Unknown
Registered User
Join date: 16 Nov 2005
Posts: 82
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12-18-2005 19:49
From: Pendari Lorentz haha! This thread so has to be bumped at Christmas time!! Merry Modmas! |
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Zippity Neutra
What'd I miss?
Join date: 29 Sep 2004
Posts: 191
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12-18-2005 20:07
Wonderful, Julian!
C'mon Siggy, where's your Ode to Modmas? I know it's in there, dying to burst out like a larval stage Alien...
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Am I random enough yet? 
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Chip Midnight
ate my baby!
Join date: 1 May 2003
Posts: 10,231
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12-18-2005 23:07
haha, Juian, that was amazing! Funniest thing in the forum... ever!
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 My other hobby: www.live365.com/stations/chip_midnight
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stpaulsub Clio
Fear the Bubblegum Gurl!
Join date: 2 Sep 2004
Posts: 607
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12-18-2005 23:25
WOW
i'm speechless
fantastic!
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From: someone David Valentino: I think I just like to play with the balls
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Joy Honey
Not just another dumass
Join date: 17 Jun 2005
Posts: 3,751
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12-19-2005 06:51
Yay! Best Modmas thread EVAR!
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Reality continues to ruin my life. - Calvin
You have delighted us long enough. - Jane Austen
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence. - Ashleigh Brilliant
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Surreal Farber
Cat Herder
Join date: 5 Feb 2004
Posts: 2,059
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12-19-2005 10:10
Now that I've finished laughing... Can we nominate Jeska for sainthood? I'm pretty sure she has performed her 3 miracles.
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Surreal
Phobos 3d Design - putting the hot in psychotic since 2004
Come see our whole line of clothing, animations and accessories in Chaos (37, 198, 43)
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Surreal Farber
Cat Herder
Join date: 5 Feb 2004
Posts: 2,059
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12-19-2005 10:11
From: FlipperPA Peregrine Women who's names end with 'ka' turn me on.
'ka' and 'fur'.
I full endorse the idea of Moderatrix II: Apocalypse! *heart breaks* *sobs uncontrollably* And here I was doing kinky things on your (former) loveseat last night....
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Surreal
Phobos 3d Design - putting the hot in psychotic since 2004
Come see our whole line of clothing, animations and accessories in Chaos (37, 198, 43)
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