Women Have Learned to Cheat from Men - and sl is not exception

I am coming to the conviction that women have learned to cheat from men. They lead us to this condition or at least "instruct" us so. In sl it is far easier to cheat than in real, and in my worwld so many men declare they have a partner but are eager to bed.

I think it boils down to a gender issue. Sure, I admit I am a woman who cheats because I am who I am. But I maintain more men are cheating with me than the women, who remain steadfast to their partners.

What do you say?

In fact my case is proven, innit? For example, I said in a previous thread I am one of teh "500 club (as I call them) and I am sure that at least 200 of those men are partnered in sl. Now they can claim their partner allows them an open relationship. Like, "Oh Yeah, Robeena Goggle-Eyes is my partner but she doesnt care" But I never check with Robeena before I get into bed with her partner. I dont say "Oh, Robeena, do you mind if I bonk your partner?" so I reckon there's a lot more cheating gong on with men than with women. Just saying. Like 200 to 1. If you know what I mean.

My hypothesis (I learnt this word yesterday) is based on what Emilia says to Desdemona in "Othello": "let them (men) use us well else let them know / the ills we do, their ills instruct us so."

I enjoy Shakespeare. I reckon he knows woman. He knows a good amount about stick fingers.
I tried to make a poll but it didnt work. I forgot how. Beside I am at an airport and its hard.
And this early in the morning I need a cup of coffee in a saucer.

Nooooo.

The basis of the thing is not men teaching women to cheat. Don't be so submissive!

What is is from nature is women searching for the right sort of genes both for breeding good healthy babies.
That's how the gene pool goes around. Fussy women and lots of available men.
Nobody is teaching women's nature anything about that.

People have developed cultures that have masked that basic urge.

If the women say no to hopping into bed with men they just meet in SL or RL and take time to know if the other person is attached then this would not be such an issue.
If I remember correctly Jig in another thread did you yourself imply that women who dont sleep around are letting the side down?

It takes 2 to tango

all those cheating women are men?

Heh. This is going to be a long one, and likely ruffle a few feathers.

In my opinion, and I could probably find statistics on this, if I weren't so lazy, men cheat more than women, but, that does not mean that women don't cheat.

These are some RL generalities. Many of them will not apply to SL.

A woman who is happy and secure in her relationship is unlikely to step out of any commitment she is in. But she will cheat to make things better for herself and her household.


A woman has a short time each month when she's most fertile, and when she's pregnant, that's it for the better part of a year. Then there's an investment of years to raise her offspring to adulthood.

Men don't like it when women cheat, because they don't want to be stuck raising and supporting another mans progeny. On the other hand, men have no problem spreading their seed all over. They have a LOT more potential opportunity to promote a pregnancy. And less incentive to raise the children.

It's women who get stuck with the unwanted pregnancy, and the burden of proof of fatherhood.

Most societies have social customs intended to keep families together and provide for children. Not to mention keeping disease in check.

In modern times, when we have access to birth control, simple ways to protect from disease, and women (arguably) have access to resources where she doesn't need the help of a man to raise her children, we are supposedly more free to indulge in extracurricular sex. But we tend to follow whatever social customs are in place, and have always existed in our respective cultures.

In SL, none of the restrictions exist any more. But we still seem to have the same tendencies. We try to pair bond, but men still have that wandering eye just for the sake of variety. And at least some women seem to feather their nests through promiscuity.

*Zips up flame retardent bunny suit*

(i can't believe i read all that, and the entire time you were just standing there unzipped...)

ok, well lets look at it from the other side...

women tend to have a higher quantity of close emotional relationships socially than men, so they are actually learning "cheating" from us, by pursuing emotional (and sexual) outside of their limited singular close emotional relationships with us.

What Dances says^

I've always believed that men are hard wired to spread our seed as far and wide as possible, even while being in a loving relationship. We can compartmentalize love and sex as two different things. Sex is just another thing that seems a lot better while doing it with someone we love - just as walking in the woods or having a cup of coffee on the balcony at sunrise is better with someone we love. Men physically and biologically don't have the same consequences as women for the act, and we are constantly driven toward it. We try not to be blatant about having the roving eye- that would be disrespectful as well as hurt ladies' feelings. But I guarantee you nearly every guy at least window shops all the time.

That does not mean we must act on those impulses however.



.

Is that a euphemism?

If so, it may help explain your "500 club" thing.

Too many men seem to have quite a difficult time in controlling their impulses. Probably something to do with the fact that so many of them have barely evolved beyond cavemen.

If you are talking about cro-magnon, then you are correct, we haven't evolved much since them. Just don't call us neanderthals.

This didn't need a new thread.

All zipped up? Good. Please clarify "But she will cheat to make things better for herself and her household. I don't want to comment off the wall til I'm sure what you mean by this.

The second snippet, I don't think it's as much supporting another man's progeny as the idea that 'Somebody is touching my stuff'. Women cheat all the time and don't get pregnant, men will go off the wall every time when they find out that 'their stuff' is being shared with another. It's about a sense of ownership, not kids. Kids only complicate that issue a small percentage of the time. Working for the agency that I do, in rl, my life is spent establishing 'whos the baby daddy'.

I know you are a guy in rl, but don't sell guys short. (You either, Weston, regarding your post, lol) There are men out there who hate, hate, hate that their 'stuff' is being shared, emotional intimacy, just as much as rl or sl sex. The idea that a woman is saying 'I love you' to someone else, sharing dreams and private thoughts and moments with another, can be just as hurtful as if he walked in and saw you banging your brains out with someone else. in the course of my job, interviewing 'baby daddies', I've had just as many men as women say to me the equivalent of " Can you make her come back to me?" How forlorn is that? No, sorry, out of my scope, but I'm sorry you are so sad. Men want intimacy too.

ETA: If I were to have sex in SL, that's what I'd feel guilty about. Since I'm not the type to do it with no emotional involvement, it would mean that I was sharing a secret part of me, that's reserved for my rl spouse, with the mind of someone else. Pixels be damned, that's nothing. It's the thought that counts.

ETA some more cause I just thought of it: When I was a kid, I used to hold Barbie in one hand and Ken in the other, and they'd 'have sex. Meaning they bumped up against each other naky, til I got bored with it. If there were no emotions involed in pixel bumping, then I'd see it as just like that, same thing. Nothing.

Newsflash: Women have always been as horny and as naughty as men all through time. Only schmucks from puritanical religious extremist influence think women have been on a pristine pedestal of purity. Meantime women have always been using their "charms" all along.

Sorry Jig, but I disagree. Men cheat very badly, they think with the wrong head. When it comes to deviousness, I think we can do it much more effectively and with greater style.

I agree will Ann... The only difference between men and women are women are more... picky. Men (esp. on sl) will "do" any woman if she says yes... Ive even been to clubs where I've seen guys get it on with sheep! Sorry guys.. lol.. but its true.

You're talking about Pep, right?

Ann, that picture is discusting. You might want to point that out.

/me backs gently away from hot button issues in this thread. I do have a lot more feelings on the topic, but I'm not finding enough writing skills to convey them well. That could be risky.

Without reading thru all the answers here...I'm gonna have to go with Sling on this one. What we do.....men or women, is very much based on societal mores as well as ingrained beliefs. (I'll steer clear of religeon on this one, tho I do think there's an obvious connection) Human beings have evolved to the point where in our society it makes more sense for a man & woman to partner up to raise a family. But is it necessarily the natural state of our species? I honestly don't believe it is. I believe that our basic instincts will always side with natures original design plan. While it certainly feels good to love and be loved, and 'security' in such a relationship is best for the survival of the family (in most cases)....it's something we've been conditioned to. Jealousy and all that petty stuff is also just as much primal.....men insure their heritage by spreading their seed......women insure their blood line by choosing a strong/suitable mate. We both actually have the same goal. And jealousy is just an emotion that evolution favored to help further motivate us to do what it is we 'do'.

Women don't learn how to cheat from men.......women know how, and human beings are opportunists......and SL is friggin candyland for opportunists.

this

and I am fixin to move to Bradford

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article77126.ece

I swore I wouldn't read any more of these threads, but I was so impressed by your first post in here, just had to pop in with a "right on!!!" (What? I'm a child of the 70's )

Your post said exactly what I would have said, just in less "fiery redhead" style.