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Dj Barracuda
Registered User
Join date: 20 Nov 2006
Posts: 11
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05-24-2007 02:00
For the three years prior to my joining game, my life was a living hell, literally. Being hurt and burned over and over again does something to you. It makes you a coldhearted b*tch. My ability to trust others diminished, and I separated myself from anything that I felt would ultimately cause me pain. My own insecurities resulting from this pain became overwhelming.
This game became somewhat of a means of therapy for me, because even in game, I found I could not run away from the fears of my RL that had been haunting me. The difference however, is that SL has helped me gain the confidence that I had lost, and when an issue in game presented itself that caused these fears to surface, I dealt with them at a different level than I have been in RL. Perhaps having a beautiful av combined with the security of hiding behind a monitor brought me to a place where I actually had to deal with these issues and was able to with confidence, and with much success.
So I guess my answer to the question of this thread is no, I did not change my RL for SL, but I am living two very different lives, and in some crazy way, each balances the other out. I keep my RL separate from my SL, and am lucky to have a partner in game who feels the same way. In game, he is the love of my life, in reality, he is a great friend that I care very deeply about.
You don't have to change your RL because of the game. What you can do is use what you learn in game to enhance the real life you have.
Dejaye
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Jax Huskerdu
Registered User
Join date: 28 Jun 2006
Posts: 250
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05-24-2007 08:55
From: Xio Jester (I don't mean your time-schedule.)
Now I was a petty criminal, done many many many things small & big I could be put away for, & ain't sure I should put em up on the Forums...only s**t I can admit to is stabbin a man 7 times w/ a huntin knife & property destruction cause those cases got closed & stricken from my record. (Stabbed guy used ta be in the same crew & didn't press charges when the doctors said he would live).
Pros: There are GOOD things about me havin changed myself (albiet to a large percent...for SL).
*I had ta curb my temper or be banned. I was known for fightin, property destruction & a general "time-bomb" mindset.
*I had ta start talkin so folks in Europe could understand me. I type how I talk usually...been on computers so long it's almost automatic.
*About %200 less "profanity" in my vocabulary had a positive effect when communicating w/ "civilized" folks.
Cons:
*A lotta folks from the background I came from try & give me trouble if I walk by & say "Hi" "Hello" "Wassup" etc... until I almost get back into trouble...I get targeted like those kids who get bullied in High School or somethin. I'm surrounded by crackheads, homeless & "gangstas". Until they see in my eyes I'm always ready to fight & just don't walk around thinkin about it, they point...whisper, laugh, even kick somethin at me. The better I can talk to SLers, the less I can talk to "regular folk" in Chicago
So I guess the Pros out-weigh the Cons. Just bugs me cause I feel like I gotta pick Chicago or SL. There are a lotta Chicagoans in SL, but they ain't from my background...not even close. They are "civilized" folks who don't get the cops after em every 5 minutes, and they never have been there, so the feasibilty of explaining my position to them is pretty shakey. (Yeah, I checked the Dictionary! Yeehaw)
What about you? Have you had to change your 1st Life person to fit the world of your computer-generated "self"?
(Sidebar: I actually started SL about 8 months ago... I was just just thinkin it was a game. Hence why my 1st av was a "superhero" & I cancelled and made another one, & finally Xio Jester. I was unemployed, fresh outta my hand-cuffs, & stayin indoors as much as possible since I was "on a roll" crime-wise, & decided it was "quittin time", for good.
"Kids, don't become a petty-criminal. It just doesn't pay.") Wow hun, Sounds like you're growing in leaps and bounds. The unfortunate part about the world described as your real life is that it only sees itself. Being so mired in your surroundings sometimes makes it hard to see the whole big world that you're a part of. Sounds like you're an exceptional person whose made some bad decisions, but you've taken responsiblity (big step!). I was raised near some pretty bad areas as well. I steered clear while my brother was pulled in. He was eventually killed by gang members. My point is that I spent a lot of time trying to expose myself to the bigger world in my early youth, and as a result my mentality is much different than people brought up in the same environment. Sounds like SL is doing the same for you. Remember, you really can leave the past behind. Label yourself "Gangsta" and you'll eventually become just that. Label yourself "loser" and it's sure to follow. I like tags like "unique (nobody else is just like you), creative (you can change your world!), important (because you woudn't be here if you weren't), and winnner (because you've succssfully changed your mindset which is half the battle in the game of life). I applaud your efforts. Self discovery is a hard journey, and anyone willing to look at themselves in a effort to exact positive change is already ahead of the pack! When you're a beacon, you're bound to attract attention. Remember if you're being taunted in the future, that it's only a signal that you're on the right track. Altough your environment might label you as weak or soft, that it takes courage to stand on your convictions and to follow your heart in doing what it knows is the right thing. You're the stong one who didn't "give in" to the world around you. You're the brave one who looked deep into yourself and to see that you are important. Ultimately you'll be the winner, because you've come closer to expressing you're true spirit, which is the biggest lesson one can learn in life.
_____________________
omigodileftthebabyonthebus!
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Oryx Tempel
Registered User
Join date: 8 Nov 2006
Posts: 7,663
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05-24-2007 10:35
I know that I've definitely let the creative side of me loose... at work in RL I'm stuck designing databases, etc. In SL I can build fantastic stuff, I can play with graphics programs making clothes, I can walk around as a giant beetle if I want to. It's funny, but I feel much more satisfied with life in general, now that I have outlets for my creative side!
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