Do You Want To Be Eaten By A Mountain Lion

I have noticed there is a silly poll going around, and misery loves company, so come on, give me your honest opinion!

Is he a lean mean fighting machine? Post a photo, please.

If said mountain lion could take a sizable bite off my midriff, in such a way that I could live happily ever after, I might be very thankful afterwards

I'd rather have PIE! grr! grrr!

Lion! It's a Lion! Ooooh, it's a Lion!

(http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com/)

What's the other silly poll? I love to vote on silliness.

Phfft. Let's see a real lion, and a real tiger!

Thanks Jillian. You managed to get MAGICAL TREVOR out of my head. [loading gun...]

Moved to Off-Topic.

Silly people, everyones knows being eaten by zombies is FAR worse.

Brain eating zombies don't scare me. I've been told I'm immune to them!

...

Why is everyone smirking at me?

My apologies. Don't click this link then.

Yes!!

I want to be reincarnated as a Mountain Lion!!!

and if that's not possible...

a Balrog!!

I ask you--where is the llama love, people?

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php

I'd like to be eaten but not by a mountain lion.

Same here-- I'd prefer to be eaten by a giant squid. You know, with the tentacular power!

It's all downhill from here on!!!

This guy will eat em..

Since we're already in off-topic... I'd like to post up this pic...

I still vote for the Polar.

Either the Polar or this guy.

Polar bears are wimps--they just slid down hills and drink Coca-Cola.

But rancors are cool--they eat unwanted slaves and fledgling Jedi.

I expect a few of you by now are beginning to expect Ellie Edo to come up with some over-serious, over-long, over-thought-out response, even to a silly thread like this.

I hate to disappoint.

It just so happens I was watching some wildlife gazelle-gobbling activity on TV
a coupla nights ago, and I got to thinking on almost exactly this topic.

Hmmm....I thought (I do that, by the way).

Hmmm....Maybe in nature the vast majority of wild creatures do actually die by being eaten alive. Even if they get ill, or injured, or unusually old, it slows them down and a gobbler gets them first.

So in truth, if its how most of them end (insects and birds and fish too) this is the end they are designed for. And if its what they are designed for (if you believe in evolution) it's what (at rock bottom) we must be designed for too, because evolution hasn't had time to redesign our deeper instincts and responses since we were running around getting gobbled ourselves.

Given that (and here the argument falters a little for reasons you might spot), isn't it possible that things would be set up by evolution so that being eaten alive is actually quite nice ?

Not at first, of course, while you still have hope, and struggle. But once you give up and resign yourself. Let the mountain lion have you.

Bit like the reports from some people who were recovered from the water that drowning is actually rather nice, after you give up, and take that first huge inbreath of cool water.

Do you like the idea ? I do get some weird thoughts, don't I ?

Edit: If you believe in God and creation instead of evolution (and crazy me has no difficulty at all in believing both at once), then you can rephrase it as "God wouldn't be so cruel as to design things so that anything he has made to be so inevitable and widespread would be a truly unpleasant experience - not once the point of struggle was gone". He'd be kind, and make it nice, wouldn't He ? Particularly if its the main way home ?

Depends, are they cute?

An entity (known to yaqui sorcerers as the "Eagle," though it has nothing to do with an actual eagle, it's just a signifier that allows us to talk about it) eats our consciousness when we die.