SLSE: Second Life Social Engineering

Disclaimer: The following thread is for humor purposes only. I will humbly ask that people take these points and those posted in response totally in jest. Avoid personal attacks, flamebait, and using the name of any resident please.

Links are allowed, so long as they're non-inflammatory. If you do use one, be courteous to the person.

Let's begin.


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Naturally, one of the biggest problems in Second Life today is controlling people. Since we - the FIC* - cannot fix everything to work as It Should (TM), we must rely instead on taming the human animal and bending its will to our purposes.

Here are my suggestions for improving Second Life through Social Engineering:




1) Place "WARNING: THIS CONTENT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR ALL AUDIENCES" disclaimers up on the borders of ALL Mature Sims, regardless of height.

We'll start with a fun one. Since we, the Elite, do not want children in Second Life, we acknowledge that many parents do (and should) watch over their child's shoulder at all times.

To this end, labelling all Mature Sims in this way will let the parents know that "Timmy Might Be Hiding Something" and belongs on the Teen Grid.




2) Disable all attachment slots but the head as a punishment for griefing.

Let them wear their [CENSORED] where it belongs.




3) Force all ban scripts to apply to their owners when someone is booted, regardless of code.

Do unto others.




4) Add a new attachment point that anyone can use on an avatar.

Uses range from "Kick Me" signs to droppings by random flyovers.




5) Add a forum "Summarize Thread" button.

It has come to our attention that too many posts are becoming pointless drivel. Give us the option to get right to the point, and ignore classbaiting, personal attacks, and AIM-speak.


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Don't be scared. Add your own feature to make people embrace The Vision!

* This post paid for by FIC Inc., and does not expressly reflect the views of the author. All Rights Reserved, including those of Game, Scenario, and Story. For external use only. Not available in Canada.

Cant you do some sort of agreement together with the Echelon people.. this link/web are about it.. how to get in contact with them is maybe easier for you.. than us normal ones..:

http://www.echelonwatch.org/


Or maybe that already are done.. dam of course it is... ok ok sorry.. You can delete this mess..

Shameless bump before the morning crowds show up.

Needs more drama sauce.

2) Disable all attachment slots but the head as a punishment for griefing.

Let them wear their [CENSORED] where it belongs.

hahahaha I love it!

coco

I am offended by your gratuitous over-usage of grammar, syntax and punctuation in your post. Please remove all periods, commas, and exclamations points immediately. Attempts at such feeble constructs as 'logic' aren't warranted. While you are at it, change your posting to use no more than 12 of the 26 alphabetical letters available. No more than two vowels, 'Y' not included.

And Yes, the FIC *does* control everything....not that we'd want you to know that.


- Newfie

*fnord*

I've always thought that "convicted" griefers should have a permanent tattoo on their avatar's forehead that simply says "POOR IMPULSE CONTROL" in big black letters.

Nice idea.. personally I'd use 'FUCKTARD' but thats just me

*sigh* Come find me inworld, look at my shirt, then ASK.


<~ Original Social Engineer.

Hot off the FIC presses comes another entry. Today we will be discussing Customer Service.

From this day forward, all Lindens and Linden alts must carry the FIC-brand Riot Kit (TM). This kit contains several tools for helping you do your job better, including the following:



1) Griefer Trap:



Tired of trying to find problems before they start? Now you don't have to, with our patented Griefer Trap!

This device is the epitomy of ease. Offers hours and hours of entertainment. You won't have to do a thing!



2) Fly-Swatter:




Our FIC-brand fly-swatter is the perfect solution for those pesky WA brawls. Serving up warnings, suspensions, and teleports home has never been this easy, or this much fun!

Comes with optional broom and spatula, for cleaning up the mess.



3) Drama Sauce:



This powerful tonic is the latest invention from our R&D department! Serving up a potent dose of llTeleportAgentHome/llEjectFromLand/llPushObject and a snazzy "bling" effect, this magic elixir is sure to have people flaming the forums in no time with threads like "I can't log in" and "Omg that terrible build crashed me."

Comes in mild, hot, and packet loss strength.



4) Nair:



A miracle of miracles, Nair is the perfect tool for those outfits that crash clients by the dozen. Featuring patented Ruth technology, this object happily removes all prim attachments from any resident.

Perfect for: Hoochie hair, "My Eyes, The Googles, They Do Nothing" bling clothing, offending members, sushi, and furries.



5) llSawzAll():



Another gem from R&D! llSawzAll() rips slashes into any script that lags a server to death.

These slashes come in pairs, commenting out all code in a ten meter radius. Perfect for those long nights in the shop.

Plasma torch also available.



6) SLAID:



Kill bugs dead with this item. The most powerful tool in this kit, SLAID kills bugs dead on contact by issuing out permanent bans.

This powerful repellant should only be used for the most dire of situations. For large groups and infestations, you can upgrade to our fogger brand.

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All kits also include a random assortment of "Money Ball" and "Free Textures Click Here" Grenades for covering your exit from the scene.

Order yours today! Supplies are limited.

*still snickering*

Though phoenixes only eat morning dew, they are not subject to droppings.... but there's a great deal of my nonphoenix kids out there that are. ^_^