Thoughts about addiction...

I think about this a lot. As a medical person (ICU nurse), and a very avid SL denizen, I find myself wishing I knew more about addiction medicine, which obviously isn't a well-understood area. Does Drew Pinsky have anything to say about computer gaming and the like?

Yet as a sim, rather than a game, SL produces some pretty interesting psychological effects. I keep meeting people who tell me how they've discovered sides of themselves they didn't know where there. That's pretty interesting. So is the mechanism of "projection" - some people can watch their avatar cuddle another and think nothing of it. Others "feel" the other person "holding" them. How does that work? There was a quote in that article in the WSJ about how people are "neurologically unable to distinguish virtual reality from 'real' reality" - or words to that effect. I guess it varies, but some people are obviously moving most of their emotional lives into virtuality. Seems dangerous. (Ducks incoming flames.)

For myself, all I know is, I love my sailboat, love my trees, love my friends, love my hummingbird, my horses, shopping for hair and shoes... could do it all day. Sometimes I do

The mind of human often given right circumstances can experience many emotions, feelings and sensations regardless of what has produced them.
Be it nightmare that causes fright, beautiful painting that takes the viewer else where, a day dream where you go to magical world in your mind.
The emotions are still real, regardless if the image or events are based on something real.
At least my unrezzed mind doesn't know the difference.
I was watching bit back on news that it said Americans have become more personally isolated and spend more time on the internet then interacting with people face to face.
It easier sometimes to be closer with someone online that shares a interest, then someone you have to deal with in real life at least for me.
I don't really have words exactly why.
But I have recently discovered the things that annoy me about my fellow Second Life residents who are friends and such are often things that annoy me in my first life either with others in my life or within myself.

I remember reading once that if something like the Star Trek Holodeck were ever invented it would have to be very tightly controlled otherwise it would be way to addicting for the average person. Why would anyone ever want to come out?

I believe the amount of time many of us choose to "live" in SL is proof that theory is pretty accurate.

Very interesting subject!

There is a whole spectrum between healthy recreation, psychological dependency and outright addiction.

For me, the danger areas revolve around:

* If I am not in-world, do I experience any symptoms of cravings, irritability, insomnia, depression?
* Do I disregard RL activities (e.g. cleaning, eating, personal care) due to SL?
* Does my partner or job suffer due to me spending time and energy spent in-world?
* Do I try to rationalize or deny anything from the above to occur?

My personal rule is that none of these questions should be answered with "yes". I try to watch this continuously in order not to let any psychological dependency foster. SL really is a "Second" life ... as in priority #2.

My brain thinks it's real. I own a friggin beachfront estate and can fly around it. And when I hug another avatar, I feel it. Pretty damn cool.

Now I know why I have cravings, get irritable, can't sleep, and am depressed. It's because you aren't inworld.

Well, of course! I'm indispensable.

Raymond - yes, exactly! I'm just saying - why is this? What is this? This is very new in human history - there's some very powerful psychological mechanism at work that's responding to this technology, and it makes for WAY powerful mojo. How could this be described? Worth looking at, I think.

I think it has to be experienced. No one who has not had their vital signs change while watching their avatar enact the poseball set "Soul Intentions" will understand what it's like or how real it feels. I know the first time it happened to me, I was completely taken by surprise and completely blown away. Still getting used to it...

I think that it is related to a very basic human desire to have control of their environment.
SL fills a lot of that - once one is familiar with the basics of the interface.
"a lot" = 'Much more than in RL'

First exposure to SL is a strong experience. Some people get sucked in deeply.
I don't think addiction to virtual is different in general principle to other forms of addiction.

There are features which make virtual addiction perhaps more insidious.
- No physical symptoms as with chemical/alcohol addiction
- Constantly available
- Cheap to free
- Legal even if used to excess
- No historic social stigma

SL takes time from RL.
There's a sensible balance that can enhance one's experience of both RL and SL.
For some, SL is far more wondrous than RL.

Yes
Yes
Partner? And I hate those RL work quests.............
None of the above is true

I'm over my heavy addiction stage, slightly bored with it if anything.

Yes, agreed, Raymond - Soul Intentions was and is astonishing. Not only does the creator get credit for an amazing piece of work, but you're pointing directly at my question. How does it happen that we identify so strongly with what our avatars are doing? Obviously it's variable - some people think it's simply silly, and then there are those of us who are just blown away.

Something about they "why" of how all this occurs that I really want to understand...

This subject is one which has been in my mind a lot. I do work with women who have partners with sexual addictions. I've learned a lot about addictions, in general because of this. And, now I find myself here in SL, highly engaged in a way I personally never thought would be possible for myself. This has led me to feeling somewhat hypocritical at times, and has made me have to access my own behaviors.

However, I realized I came here for other purposes, but found like others, that relationships/friendships can be formed here due to this new way of interacting. It is not necessarily a process of addiction for everyone, as it is relating in a new way in "a brand new world", literally. I am not shirking my RL for SL at all. I know the symptoms of compulsion and obsession from the work I do, and am not experiencing them - but will admit to totally enjoying my time in the game.

I do know the difference - SL is fantasy, but I also know that it is causing real feeling to pass into me. Totally unexpected ones. The first time I experinced this I was blown away. And frankly, a bit scared. I've been online forever, I've never had anything like this occur before. It was overwhelming. And, it wasn't with every Av around, it was with a specific one or two, like in RL, the type of connection you would feel when you meet someone for real.

Additionally - being here enables a person to open up themselves in ways they may not be able to in RL. This certainly can be highly addictive to some, or just a way of developing parts of yourself that you can't in RL for others. For me, it's the second.

All in all, a lot to ponder; and I have been. Would be very interesting to see studies done on this as time goes by and I'm very interested to hear others opinions on this too. It's very very confusing and enlightening for me at the same time. But loving the experience.

Those who find it silly do not have a connection with the avatar they are engaging in Soul Intentions with.

This is all about real connections using computers and animation as the communications vehicle. It is for me, anyway.

Oh yes! So right Raymond. That was one of the ones which got to me too...combined with the word play going on with my BF and I. Too much to handle...

And not to get off track, but we've been trying to find where to buy it. Do you know?

Pertty sure it's at Bits and Bobs. If you can't find it by searching that, there's a copy rezzed on the platform on the top of the mountain on my sim in Liome. Click on it to get the creator and check his profile for a landmark.

Thanks Raymond

To add fertilizer to your ideas - I have found the peculiar effect of having slightly different behaviors or personalities with different avatar shapes/skins. It's as if it's a body conscious thing with me. It's all me, or different facets of me, but the different avatars seem to give me permission to behave a little differently (none of them destructive or rude I trust).

I'm certain this platform is not a physical addiction. I don't sit at work and dream about rushing home to fire up SL. I DO dream about rushing home, however, and booting up the computer for me is as automatic as is it is for some people to turn on the TV. I have posted a recent thread detailing some of my struggles with this and I think I am in a good place to be more sensible with my time.

/the real me logs off to continue cleaning the house

The best medicine is just to deny it.

i'm one of those who does not invest my emotions into the game. it's just eye candy to me. visual chat. i spend more time in this forum than inworld. i prefer 'getting to know people' vs. getting to look at their costume. i dunno if that helps....

Me, too.







... and FAR healthier IMO.

My name is Puppet Shepherd, and I am a recovering SL addict.

This addiction thing is something I've contemplated quite a bit. I (Puppet) used to be an alt. My main avatar owned some land, ran a small business, and did some land speculation for approximately six months. She also posted on the forums quite a bit, so some of you may remember her. I speak of her in third person now because I (my real life self) had to kill her. I became very wrapped up in my primary avatar and took a lot of things personally, and just took the whole thing far too seriously. The way Linden Labs runs things, you can drive yourself nuts if you take it all too seriously and I got pretty infuriated with some things that reasonable people would only find annoying.

I neglected quite a few things in my real life, and when some pressing issues came up this past summer that I needed to deal with, the only way for me to let go and feel okay about it was to "kill myself". I kept my alt for when I would have more free time and felt I could get back into Second Life with a more reasonable mindset. I am careful not to get too financially invested here, and I don't spend very much time in the forums now, because it used to get me pretty riled up about stuff. My main focus now is to use SL as a creative outlet rather than to obsess about running a business and making people like me. If I find myself getting too emotionally invested again, I may end up repeating the process - but I think I understand enough now about how SL can suck you in that I can see it coming sooner and reduce my participation accordingly.

Besides, I don't want to kill off Puppet - I am a totally adorable doggie! This brings me to (hopefully) my final point, and something that may help some people who may be falling into SL addiction. My first avatar was a human female who bore a striking resemblance to my real life self. I think that made it a whole lot easier to get emotionally invested in her, and to blur the line between reality and the virtual world. Being a dog seems to work better for me. Dogs don't really take anything seriously!

I have found that I am addicted to the Live music on SL, I love to hear the music, I am on almost everynight so I can listen I leave the PC on set my AVA to dance and go about my RL business... (my favorite is Eyewall Paine, omg you have to hear this guy!!)

I do not interact much with others, and am probably somewhat antisocial in this aspect, but I met a guy.. we had a thing... used soul intentions... developed a nice relationship, then it ended.. Now I have no wish to go through that again... So, my time on SL... I am usually found at a live show.. Being an Aquarius in RL, I think it is really weird that how I am in RL is very much a part of who I am in SL.... People think I am not interested, or stuck up... I'm not ! I'm just very shy and so old school! I am not a natural flirt.. I have to work at it... I dont understand the flattery process... If I like it I say so , if I dont I skirt around the truth... I dont want to hurt people! And I do not know how to be anything other then who I am!! I wish I could get into some role playing, maybe that would help.. Just dont have a clue where to start..

However, I will say I spend endless hours, and sometimes up till 4am, making clothing, uploading textures, filling prims with my creations and building things..... Okay, my dishes do pile up sometimes, and my laundry is also building a nice pile.. (happens before SL too FTR) There are weeds growing my yard I never had before... I am a smoker, and for some reason I have been smoking alot since I got on SL... and eating less... That is the part that concerns me most... I have two addictions that feed off each other... I probably need an intenvention... at least on the smoking part, it will kill me.. SL will not...


I don't as a general rule use SL for the "poseballs" except the dance ones, and dont have much experience in relationship to how they make me feel... I know when you are with a special person, they make you feel all warm and fuzzy.. But with the wrong person all you can do is laugh!

I would assume that the visual you get is somewhat like porn... I suppose this is why so many women in SL walk around with nary a stitch of clothing on....and why the guys react to them more than a ava with class! Come on ladies, make the guys work for it.. sheesh.... Make them wonder if you have real nipples and a real.. you know what! and please wear panties when you wear those skirts! omg!

I dont see how changing the ava reverses the process, you are still on SL and still addicted my friend! Come sit on the addiction couch with me, we have fluffy pillows and rezzable tequila!

You can take it seriously or take it as a joke, but you are still taking it~

At the risk of sounding noobish, what exactly is Soul Intentions?