Missing people, and who were they, anyway...?

Just anywhere and everywhere. Go to events that interest you. Go to discussions that interest you. If you want to avoid people who are looking to hook up, don't hang around in clubs and such where people are hooking up.

I met my eventual partner here on the forums of all places, and we were friends for about a year before we got together -- so it isn't the case, certainly, that everyone you meet wants to jump on a poseball and then dump you. You have to be wary of those, but an easy-ish way to avoid them is to avoid the places where they tend to hang out.

Gita, I second what was said above - the best way to meet potential friends is to go to events and builds that are interesting to you and make conversation with the people you encounter there.

When I think about my oldest friends in SL, I think of people I met at a place that came up in a search for "Bollywood" before I built my own place that would come up in such a search. And I think of someone I met in the peaceful setting of the SL Botanic Gardens, a conversation about our shared experiences having unusual avatars and about the lovely build we were standing in.

I think of people I met at the Forum Cartel Hangout, which I heartily recommend to you as a great place to meet nice, interesting folks. There is often someone hanging out there - not always, but often - and a lot of people monitor a HUD that tells them who is there, so if you find yourself alone and hang out for a few minutes it's very likely that someone else will pop in.

Finally, I've made wonderful friends at my own place, where I meet people who share my love of world music.

Pursuing your own interests is the best way to find like-minded folks.

Thank you all for answering, this alone tells me a lot about the nice people in SL.

Actually today I found a new friend, clearly a senior citizen in RL, but oh, so fun!

There are beautiful places in SL to explore. I visited Acropolis today when my new friend TPd me there. Better to avoid the clubs for a while...

Please don't hesitate to find me in SL and change a few words! (this I haven't figured out yet, how to see where someone is after I find the person in search tool..)

You can't, unless you are on the friends list AND they have checked the "show location on map" function. It's very, very rare in SL for someone to allow that function -- normally it's only very, very close friends, partners, RL spouses -- this kind of thing -- who have access to seeing where you are on the map. It's a privacy issue, as well as not wanting to be dropped in on unannounced issue. Honestly, many people even turn off the default setting of allowing their friends to see when they are logged in -- again, an issue of privacy and wanting to control their SL experience to a greater degree.

To do what you are seeking to do, most people simply friend the person and send an IM to chat with them and if they want to meet up, send them a teleport request.

Ok, that is what I thought it would be. To think of it, it is actually good thing that one can not locate a person via search tool, that would easily lead to stalking! I would hate to be stalked, as propably would anyone else.

Well, actually you can, but it takes more money and time and the consequences of getting caught are much higher. And while I am not one of those that dismiss everything in SL as a 'game', I do pretty much see my FIRST avatar as an alt. It isn't real life and my real relationships are in RL. I have my share of conversational and RP friends in SL, but that is as far as I want it to go.

Which is what the real problem with the SL relationship issues come to - it seems most often to me to be one between a person looking for relationships colliding with a 'game player'. Since these gamers are often doing SL as one big RP, I'm not sure you are going to tell the nutters from the sane, and the damage will be the same anyway. Its the same problem with the old chat rooms writ large, but seeing the avatar seems to remove that caution for many.

Okay but that's like saying the difference between a grenade and Hiroshima is one of degree. Point taken, but the difference in degree at some point becomes a difference in kind: it is far, far, far easier to do that in SL, and so it is done more frequently in SL.



Well yes and no. Yes, people need to be cautious. Perhaps even more so because there are 3d avatars involved which can attach people in a deeply visual/psychological sense. But at the same time, it's nevertheless legitimate to call the predators out on the carpet for being predators, for taking advantage of the anonymity and so forth.

I would also like to point out that newbies are easy targets for RP's. Newbies don't know what to expect or how things can be...I try to tell the newbies I meet (especially the young teens) that you never know who is behind the avatar, so be careful. I can especially say that from experience. Regards Not a Newbie Anymore.

I would like to meet this girl.

I could be those things for you.......

Hopefully you're telling the young teens that they belong on the Teen Grid, and not the Main Grid.

I don't know the difference...how do I guide them there?