When the Phone Rings - Oh she's just an Escort

Can't address Jig's particular situation as never been in it, but I agree with Briana as far as the generalities of friendship. I don't see or treat my SL friends any differently than I would an RL friend, and am closer to some of them that I've never met, than I am to many people in my RL. I respect them and their time investment and am glad they are spending time with me, too. They are people just like I am. I wouldn't treat a RL friend like that. When it comes to friendship, I just don't see much difference I guess, in the RL/SL divide. I mean, there's not a divide for me, they are all just friends, who I treat the same.

For me if my phone rings i can still do both at the same time..
my cell i have an ear piece and use that so my fingers are free to type..

at work i'll have my cell and two other lines going and will be opening files on the computer or taking notes in note pad..
if there is something other than the phone that will take longer i will tell the person in world that i have to take care of this and it should only take so long or it may take a while..i'll understand if they want to go do something else..most will sort inventory or IM someone or just go do something and have me IM them when i get back..

If someone has to go afk..i don't ask the same things of them really..i understand RL gets in the way..most will tell me they will brb or they will be a long time..that or something is going on and they have to leave..

if they say brb and i find myself sitting there for too long with no word..i'll just tp out of there and in my home doing something else..most times they will IM later with a sorry..
i've never really let it get to me because anything can happen in rl at any moment..

if there is a pattern and it happens frequently..i'll just look at it as someone playing games and won't be wasting my time with them anymore until they decide to stop wasting mine..

but i've always understood that RL comes first..it still doesn't mean you leave someone sitting for a long time..or they leave you sitting without some sort of time or no word at all..

Was.
Did my time. And was very happy. I really felt I was doing lonely men a lot of good.

Not an unusua perspective for peopel involved in virtual relaities. But as people here have pointed out, the pixels are simply MY "persona" - I am still human and still "there". Truly, avoiding as much philosophy as possible, what exactly IS reality?

After all, you are engaged in a form of telephone conversation by using SL. When a telephone rings the next person in line should be the one to wait (and a decent excuse be made by the person to the one who is on sl) Truly I usually defriend immediately if I sense evasion and rudeness of that type. I do that in real too.

When I did my escorting (long ago - maybe Jig hadnt been born then) I met a really super person. "she" was a he, but he was so gentle and kind, and very funny. He reminded me of so many of my gay friends. But one thing always sticks in my memory:

The first rule of Second Life: Someone is always on the "other side" of the keyboard.

I hope I never forget that. But many peopel do. Makes me wonder just what they're like with their so-called "real" friends and families.

The last time I was at a Hang Out party, I had a call that my sister had had a stroke (though she is fine now). I did have the courtesy to jot down in chat "Sorry gotta go, RL urgent issues." Then I logged out.

Cartoons or not, I do know there are real beings on the other side of the keyboard.



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one thing i forgot to add is that some people still hide that they are even using SL..
Depending what i am doing i'll have to do quick log off's myself if someone comes pulling into the driveway..like my father LOL..

ohh gotta go my father just pulled into the drive..be back as soon as he leaves..have to run O.O

i can't hold anything against anyone if they feel the same need even without a word..some minimize their window and some just poof..it's understandable.

This !!

The people I am interacting with in SL are real and they have given me some of their time for some interaction, whether that be talking, exploring, some RP situation, or an intimate encounter, so I respond with courtesy. If the SL encounter is not too involved and the phone rings, I will type something like "brb, phone" and go answer it. If it is something that will keep me out of SL for more than a minute or two, I will return to the computer and tell whomever that I need to be afk for some time and I can meet up with them another time or they can wait until I return to the computer. Granted there could be times when I have to leave quickly - some emergency in RL that requires me to simply say "emergency, gotta go, will catch you later" and poof I am gone.

If I am nothing more than a pixel to someone, not worthy of simple common courtesy, then I won't be giving them any of my time in the future.

I hope the sister is good now. So frightening for you.
Your real, okay.

/me wants mod powers here just long enough to hook up compatible threads. See, there's this thread on netiquette in SL...and then there's this thread about not leaving your SL mistress for your RL wife even for a few minutes...

problem is the pixels are connected to real people, so it really depends for me...

- when i get a phone call while in a chat, i would try to treat the chat as an visitor in my home ....keeping some contact if it takes long.. but it does have a lower "priority" so if called for i would reschedule the chat

- when i get rl visitors to my door, i would treat the chat as a phonecall ..making them aware of the doorbell, and try to help quickly or schedule a new chat if the visitor is staying.

must say i have felt most people looked at it this way..


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It could have been a thing of SL mistress vs RL mistress..........

I would guess that people who regard other people as "pixel cartoons" don't fare very well for very long in SL.

There have been people with that attitude for as long as there has been online social interaction. I used to see it a lot in web-based chatrooms. People who, for one reason or another, would eventually come out with, "Hey, what are you going all 'real' on me for? It's only a game/computer/whatever. I don't come here to deal with real life, I come here to relax." They didn't get to relax for very long because they soon discovered that nobody would have anything to do with them.

The thing is, if they didn't *come* to deal with real people, they wouldn't *be* dealing with them. There are plenty of ways to be entertained and to relax on the internet without interacting with human beings. If one is going to interact with people online, there is no excuse for treating them any differently then one would if one was in the same room with them in RL.

People like this are being disingenuous. They aren't following some natural common-sense set of priorities that are inherent in online interaction. They simply want to be free from human responsibilities; they want to treat real people like mannequins and get away with it. If they tried it in RL, they'd be shunned or injured. When they try it online, they should get nothing more than the backs of our virtual hands.

This thread stopped delivering some time ago.

Why would that matter? It's just stateless pixels on a screen.

Time for bed.
Cold night.
Yes I'm alone.

Back in the bad old days of dial up, I was on the computer doing whatever when some urgent calls couldn't get through. I only had one line at the time. Later got a second dedicated for the computer. Then pounding on front door. Where-upon I turned off my computer and cowered in the corner (it was something like 1 am or 2 am). That is until I heard voices through the door that I recognized. People who would have had to drive roughly 45 to 2 hours to get to me. My grandfather had died.

I'm still somewhat sad that I was poking away on the computer late at night when all that was occuring.

Glad to hear your sister is fine now.

*jumps into first social SL discussion*

I have to say I totally agree with Jig, mostly due to the comment of "he was talking to a REAL person"

If someone said that to me, I would block online and drop mentally; that guy is a waste of time.

You are a human being, speaking through text, or voice, or face to face; does not matter the medium.

Hang tough, Jig.

Bravely done - next thing you know you'll be posting in the Zombie, erm, Undying Thread.

Pep (golf claps.)

Here's the link, Domitan - in case you aren't sure what Pep is referring to.

/327/85/252954/1.html

Don't bother trying to read it all - just jump right to the end and say HI.

/me goes to pour some more gold into the star mold.