Is anyone else suffering the Monday Morning blues?

The office is quiet, no hustle and bustle. everyone seems moody, tired and generally crabby. The coffee pot is being emptied quicker then its being made, and the women are stocking up on chocolate as if its going out of fashion. Even our customers are more stressed and problematic then usual.

I need cheering and waking up, come on peeps, make me laugh. I dare ya!

Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is of a different gender than you.

Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Cha-cha."

Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as much since you did this.

While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in Palmolive liquid. Call everyone Madge.

Hang mosquito netting around your cubicle. When you emerge to get coffee or a printout or whatever, slap yourself randomly the whole way.

Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask him or her if they want fries with that.

Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.

Put your trash can on your desk. Label it "IN."

Feign an unnatural and hysterical fear of staplers.

Send e-mail messages saying there's free pizza or donuts or cake in the lunchroom. When people drift back to work complaining that they found none, lean back, pat your stomach and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than that."

BEST ONE: Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has withdrawn from caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

some more fun ones

during the morning greet every body with "good afternoon" then after lunch greet everyone with "good morning"

refer to yourself in the third person all day

start the "HFL" (hallway football league) with a nerf football and 2 trashcans (rest of the rules are to be made up as you go)

play polka music until everyone is insane

listen to audio books in another language that you don't speak and say its a "cultural experience"

hang Andy Griffith posters in your cubicle and then make everyone address you as Barney

transfer all calls to yourself at least once

tell people to call you back on Sunday

use the "announcer voice" common to all game shows when talking to anyone

change your voicemail messgae to "hello.............Hello!........HELLO!!..........."

if you have a Nextel with the direct connect feature, beep yourself repeatedly

if male put all the "girly" magazines like Cosmo on your desk and call it market research. Females use Sports Illustrated and other "manly" magazines

when sending emails, send them one word at a time

I think this was one of the funniest forum threads ever. Give it a read if you missed it the first time around: How to eat a muffin during a business meeting.

For years we had some mysterious joker at work who would put screaming chimpanzee sounds over the intercom every so often.

perhaps you just need to start out with a nice cup of coffee... redneck coffee

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