Interview With A Land Baron

H4ml3t L1nd3n: I'm glad you took the time to talk with me today, Mr Shang.

Desmond Shang: Of course, Hamlet. Actually, I've been looking forward to this.


H4ml3t: It's H4ml3t, not Hamlet. He was my godf4ther on my mother's side.

Desmond: Forgive me. I may sound a bit arcane, but no offence intended.

H4ml3t: Where shall we st4rt? Tell me, how did you... become what you 4re?

Desmond: It was... long ago. Things were different then. I had a small estate, but was reckless, and took great risks.

H4ml3t: Go on.

Desmond: And so it happened one night back in 2006 - I was mugged on a small parcel, by a Land Baron. I had nowhere to turn. When it was done, I had a patch of land, but barely a few drops of $L left.

H4ml3t: 2006!?

Desmond: Yes.

H4ml3t: Oookay. So.. you lost 3verything?

Desmond: As I lay there, financially near death... he asked me: "Do you want to live?" I struggled with this... and finally... choked out a 'yes'.

H4ml3t: This is horrifying. What ex4ctly did he do for you?

Desmond: He gave me a small Rent-O-Matic, and taught me many things. I both admired and feared who he was... and he taught me a great deal about myself.

H4ml3t: I pr3sume you learned some profound busin3ss lessons.

Desmond: Yes, I did. I had incredible capabilities now - it was easy to gain $L and dominion over land - phenomenally easy! But... I had to feed.

Desmond: This was a horrible thing. I didn't want to do it. I tried to survive off dwell, incentives, camping chairs... but it was never enough. I needed the $L of innocent, new users... craved it, could not continue without it.

H4ml3t: So what h4ppened?

Desmond: I succumbed. In time, I became rich and powerful, but always, the moral conflict stirred that place where my soul was.

Desmond: Once in a while, rather than drain a tenant dry... just as I had bled almost every last $L... I offered the choice given me. Thus, some of my tenants became Land Barons themselves, sometimes independent, sometimes in a rather unholy alliance with me.

H4ml3t: F4scinating. But since this is going in the L4nd and 3conomy Forum, what busin3ss commentary might you add?

Desmond: My only comment to you is in regard to the inevitability of it all. You may despise and shun our kind, but... there will always be some.

Desmond: Banish the $L, make land free - it does not matter. There will always be those that feed. It is the way of the economy, larger than any man's wishes.

H4ml3t: Ok, l4st question.

Desmond: Of course.

H4ml3t: You s4y this beg4n in 2006. That was over 150 y3ars ago. Wouldn't th4t make you one of the oldest avatars 4live?

Desmond: No one will admit to their user's death, H4mlet. When was the last time you talked to 4nshe face to face?

H4ml3t: I can't s4y that I ever have.

Desmond: Even the minor land barons hire humans for this or that purpose. Artificial Intelligence is even more expensive, but exposing evidence of our user's death is certain death for our avatar selves.

Desmond: It took thirty years of lobbying to get our start dates removed from our profiles, but you can see why it was done.

H4ml3t: Thank you for the candid interview, Desmond.

Desmond: Of course, H4mlet. Have a good day, enjoy having a soul, and remember, I have a special on some land set aside just for you.

/clap ... and applause

Hmph. You think YOU'RE old. Check out Phoenix Linden's birth date sometime.



P2

I wonder how Phoenix Linden survived the y1.5k bug. As for Desmond, giving interviews to give away the whole secret of feeding land barons is a very risky thing to do, don't you think. I hope everone sees this as just a peice of fiction.

So what happens? Does the vampire eat him?

Secrets? Why, it's a just a myth - ask anyone.



When my sim is ready, I'll be Certain to sate your curiosity.

I'm preparing a plot of land *just* for you, and my fondest wish is that you will remain there forever.

Loved it

* a scream pierces the night, and a small shred of fiction becomes fact... *