NASA broke the universe!

http://www.comcast.net/news/index.jsp?cat=GENERAL&fn=/2005/07/05/171305.html



"Marina Bai has sued the U.S. space agency, claiming the Deep Impact probe that punched a crater into the comet Tempel 1 late Sunday "ruins the natural balance of forces in the universe," the newspaper Izvestia reported Tuesday."

"Bai is seeking damages totaling $300 million - the approximate equivalent of the mission's cost - for her "moral sufferings," Izvestia said, citing her lawyer Alexander Molokhov. She earlier told the paper that the experiment would "deform her horoscope."

Omg Rofl

But is the Universe still under waranty?

I can't believe she was able to find a lawyer willing to take that case! The deep impact probe was like a fly hitting the windshield of a bus. It couldn't have altered its orbit in any way. It's amazing to me in this day and age how many people still believe in astrology. It's pure bunk.

As far as I know, there is no established symbology in astrology for comets, apart from harbingers of doom or perhaps a sign that the next Mark Twain has been born. As Chip points out, the impact of the probe will not affect the comet in any significant way.

This one is a stretch even for the imaginative Russian legal system.

Umm .. even if NASA could even Destroy said comet, why is this woman entitled to money becuase of it? Does she own it or something?

Astrology is kind of hard to prove in court, I would think.

Heck I think much of Astronomy would be hard to prove in court. Its as complicated as DNA evidence, and that even tends to lose juries.

The heavens will punish you for that kind of talk Chip! I can only take a wild guess who the next comet is going to hit.

very funny news article, thanks for sharing!

LOL, too funny! (Also the headline of this thread.)

Hey, Chip, what's your sign?

coco

I have more than one. "You must be this tall to ride this ride" and "Keep hands and feet inside car until it has come to a complete stop."

I just want to know if they'll be calling any expert witnesses on universe creation. Wouldn't it be ironic if the Second Coming was due to a Federal subpeona?

I'm half tempted to calculate the new orbital parameters for the comet.

Based on the knowledge of the probe's mass (google this), impact point (right up the backside), and relative impact velocity (widely published online), you could probably estimate the amount of comet mass released in the impact (there's a cratering equation somewhere out there...check a planetary astronomy textbook). Add the probe's mass to the core of the comet and conserve momentum to get the new velocity of the combined probe+comet. Plug that into the equation for the orbital parameters to find the new semi-major axis.

Too easy. They should call me as a witness in this trial.

MY sign is "Right Turn On Red After Stop," or sometimes "No Parking 6:00 AM to 11:00 AM."

P2

Lol, Liona! Sounds like that would make a terrific Saturday Night Live sketch!

coco

I laughed pretty hard at this one. Does that mean that I can sue this lady for $300 million because she made my side hurt?


Gydeon.

Surely this woman should be happy that NASA crashed their probe into the comet. After all, now that the cosmic ephemeris (whatever the hell she means by that) has been changed, she can go after some of her original customers and give them new readings. After all, who wants an imprecise horoscope?

Then again, she'd probably have to sell an awful lot of horoscopes to equal $300M if she does strike the celestial jackpot and somehow win her suit.

I can -- the lawyer gets paid win lose or draw... it's just a matter of how much and by whom.

Siggy.

Said the bug to self (prior to hitting said bus windshield)"Ohhh this is gonna leave a mark"

NEWSFLASH!

The comet went offworld in Cardova and has been returned to your inventory