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I already have seen a proposal for drum research, but I have an equally serious but more pressing area of research.
My area of research, that will most intrigue my fellow colleagues, is based on the following question: What manner of evolution transpired to allow us to so perfectly and skillfully drive something as complex as automobiles?
Exhibit A:
When I'm in a car, I feel like the seat was perfectly shaped for me. When I look down, there are an adequate number of pedals to be operated by my feet (and never too many). My reflexes are highly attuned and I never get in an accident. However, I have noticed that some people, particularly females, are not such proficient drivers. Evolution must have surely taken some strange turns to allow some people to drive better than others, with women at a disadvantage.
After long and rigorous research, I have stumbled upon some historical documents that would explain how evolutionary events could have allowed such a unique differentiation of traits.
Exhibit B:
As you can see in Exhibit B, our prehistoric ancestors devised vehicles for travel. When predatory dinosaurs were near, the caveman with the vehicle could speed away. The caveman who couldn't drive the vehicle would, given the odds, most likely be eaten by a pack of ravenous raptors if left to fend for himself.
As pictured in Exhibit B, Women, being the more delicate sex of the species (and not wanting to develop calluses since the vehicles were leg powered), rode in the back and consequently didn't develop as highly attuned driving skills. Incidentally, this also explains why many men evolved to have foot fetishes. Perfect feet indicated more fertile women because they didn't have to run from raptors or power cars themselves.
This course of events also explains why women are attracted to men with fast cars. Fast cars are genetically encoded to represent virtual immunity from dinosaur attacks. The alternative to attraction to fast cars is the attraction to big trucks. However, there is a striking disparity between penis size of men with fast cars and big trucks. Big trucks most often indicate infantile penises. It seems odd that women would be attracted to men with big trucks, but I can also explain this through evolution. When the mechanisms of the fast car broke, the dinosaurs would catch up and only the most virile men would be able to fight them off. Therefore, only the most virile men survived to have offspring genetically encoded to drive fast cars. If the mechanisms of the truck broke, the passengers would still remain safe because the trucks towered above the ravenous raptor pack. In this manner, men with highly developed big truck genes could still be desirable despite inadequate genitalia.
Exhibit C: