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Smart Women

April Chung
Isle of Bliss Owner
Join date: 7 Jun 2004
Posts: 478
10-17-2005 13:07
SMART WOMEN



1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.


4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female..... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.


5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female..... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.


6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male...... A source of entertainment, self-_expression, male bonding.


7 . REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

AND;


He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . You wear pants don't you?

He said . Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
She said . We don't know; it has never happened.
He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?

She said . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
_____________________
Like a moth to a flame burned by the fire.
My love is blind.
Can't you see my desire?
Chance Abattoir
Future Rockin' Resmod
Join date: 3 Apr 2004
Posts: 3,898
10-17-2005 13:11
8. RELAXATION
Male- Restoring sanity by seeking a quiet place
Female- Never shutting the f* up. :)
_____________________
"The mob requires regular doses of scandal, paranoia and dilemma to alleviate the boredom of a meaningless existence."
-Insane Ramblings, Anton LaVey
Teri LaFollette
*smiles knowingly*
Join date: 26 Jan 2004
Posts: 161
10-17-2005 13:15
:D that was pretty good there April.....point for Ms...April

forgot my favorite....

7 course gourmet meal
female: shrimp cocktail, consomme', spring mix salad w/feta cheese, cracked wheat rolls with hand churned butter, garlic skinned potatoes and filet of flounder, stuffed and for desert bananas foster
male: a hot dog and a six-pack :)
_____________________
witty, wonderful and wise
Follows Selador Cellardoor around.... ;)
April Chung
Isle of Bliss Owner
Join date: 7 Jun 2004
Posts: 478
10-17-2005 14:36
To freakin funny
_____________________
Like a moth to a flame burned by the fire.
My love is blind.
Can't you see my desire?