Waiting for Wilma

It's Comin' Right For Us!




Despite the name, it ain't pretty.


For those of you that have never experienced a tropical storm, they're somewhat akin to Christmas in July. You wake up one morning, bleary-eyed and caffeine-deprived, only to discover the day's human progress has ceased. Schools are closed. Work pushed later into the week. And under the potted tree lie packages by the dozen.


Only these packages don't contain presents. Instead, they're supplies. Hammers. Nails. Shutters. Plywood. Purified Water. Canned foods. Non-Perishables. Clothing. Just enough to survive the first days of World War III. And, true to form, hurricanes too are consumerist holidays.


This may surprise non-natives, but we can't just "hide in the basement." Florida has a water table roughly five feet below ground level, so any builder in their right mind avoids digging too deeply. Compounding the problem is the bedrock of the entire state, comprised mostly of soft limestone and discarded shells of sea creatures long gone. The net result is houses with very little to hold on to without digging further below ground.


Fortunately, hurricanes are more hype than hurt. Unless your city happens to be bowl-shaped and below sea-level, hurricanes typically have a low death toll. You can see them coming days in advance and make the necessary preparations. And zoning in storm-blown regions usually has its very own hurricane code. I weathered the eye of a Category Five hurricane in a house that is not only still standing, but suffered nearly no structural damage up to the present.



''So why worry about them,'' you might ask. Indeed, many people just throw their worries to the wind, grab a six pack, and party like the resurrection of Mardi Gras.


Those are the ones that get killed.



The other casualties of these storms: everything not tied down when the cyclone barrels over the coastline. While the houses [usually] don't suffer much structural damage, the debris of a storm is a sight to behold.

As a result, hurricanes are just ''great'' for big businesses. Not only does everyone freak out and stock up on everything imaginable, but once the winds die down, corporations are the ones that get to clean up the mess at a huge profit. Even the oil companies do their part in the consumer scramble, happily prying the lid off of already unimaginable prices in the States (though not so across the pond).


Of anyone, Walmart and OPEC are the ones making the killing here.



Long story short, Wilma looks scary. But after the pieces are put back together, life goes on.