Fix yourself up, you filthy criminal!
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Neehai Zapata
Unofficial Parent
Join date: 8 Apr 2004
Posts: 1,970
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02-17-2006 03:31
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/02/16/AR2006021602039_pf.htmlFrom: someone The Ugly Face of Crime
By Richard Morin
Friday, February 17, 2006; A02
"I'm too ugly to get a job."
-- Daniel Gallagher, a Miami bank robber, after police captured him in 2003
The hapless Mr. Gallagher may have been ugly, but he was also wise.
Not only are physically unattractive teenagers likely to be stay-at-homes on prom night, they're also more likely to grow up to be criminals, say two economists who tracked the life course of young people from high school through early adulthood.
"We find that unattractive individuals commit more crime in comparison to average-looking ones, and very attractive individuals commit less crime in comparison to those who are average-looking," claim Naci Mocan of the University of Colorado and Erdal Tekin of Georgia State University. So for all you people out there who refuse to moisturize, take note. A little extra time taking care of yourself will make a difference. Get your hair out of your eyes. Wash your face everyday. Brush your teeth. In the mornings it helps to place a warm washcloth over your eyes to help draw out the oils that have collected there overnight. Don't wear white shoes unless you are a nurse or a bride. Never carry a purse that is larger than your head. Do not wear overalls unless you work on a farm. Rabbit fur is for rabbits. Buy new underwear every month. This is especially important for men. Good underwear is not expensive and it makes you feel good about yourself. You should always wear underwear and an undershirt unless it is extramely casual clothing. Remember, you wear it to protect your clothing from you! To much makeup makes you look like a whore. If the sun is out, tone it down. At night, go crazy and glam it up. Do not, I repeat DO NOT color your hair if you do not have the time and discipline to maintain your roots. It is just ugly and it hurts the rest of us to look at it.
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Unofficial moderator and proud dysfunctional parent to over 1000 bastard children.
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Spinner Poutine
Still rezzin or am I
Join date: 28 Oct 2005
Posts: 583
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02-17-2006 03:37
For the guys...black socks do not go with shorts 
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Can't we all just get along? Doughnuts,err Pie, for everyone
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Reitsuki Kojima
Witchhunter
Join date: 27 Jan 2004
Posts: 5,328
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02-17-2006 03:40
What about those of us who think underwear is optional, depending on what pants are being worn?
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I am myself indifferent honest; but yet I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me: I am very proud, revengeful, ambitious, with more offenses at my beck than I have thoughts to put them in, imagination to give them shape, or time to act them in. What should such fellows as I do crawling between earth and heaven? We are arrant knaves, all; believe none of us.
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Neehai Zapata
Unofficial Parent
Join date: 8 Apr 2004
Posts: 1,970
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02-17-2006 03:42
From: someone What about those of us who think underwear is optional, depending on what pants are being worn? Those of you who think underwear is optional are wrong. It is not optional. People who do not wear underwear are single-handedly responsible for the decline of the American textiles industry. Why do you hate America?
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Unofficial moderator and proud dysfunctional parent to over 1000 bastard children.
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Reitsuki Kojima
Witchhunter
Join date: 27 Jan 2004
Posts: 5,328
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02-17-2006 03:44
From: Neehai Zapata Those of you who think underwear is optional are wrong. It is not optional.
People who do not wear underwear are single-handedly responsible for the decline of the American textiles industry. Why do you hate America? Pfffft. Why do you fear freedom?
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I am myself indifferent honest; but yet I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me: I am very proud, revengeful, ambitious, with more offenses at my beck than I have thoughts to put them in, imagination to give them shape, or time to act them in. What should such fellows as I do crawling between earth and heaven? We are arrant knaves, all; believe none of us.
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Edward Mathys
Shapeshifter
Join date: 5 Dec 2005
Posts: 157
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02-17-2006 05:30
only the ugly one start nude colony too.
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Tod69 Talamasca
The Human Tripod ;)
Join date: 20 Sep 2005
Posts: 4,107
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02-17-2006 05:40
And this extra tidbit for Guys: Black or White socks do NOT go well with shorts and sandals!!!! Geeeeyaaaahh!! if you want a lesson in Bad Fashion, go to a Walmart around 3 AM. Sleevless shirts, no teeth, Sports Team Baseball hat, looking like you just came from a hard day at the garage..... and that's just the women!!!! 
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really pissy & mean right now and NOT happy with Life.
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Deem Goodliffe
Registered User
Join date: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 37
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02-17-2006 07:40
most ppl who like going underwearless gotta fetish for lapping up ass juice like a dog.
anyways yes one needs to clean themselves up but it goes to show you that rappers rule the world. they clean themselves all the time.
my point? Listen to rap and you rule the world listen to that cRock music and you are in jail for wife or child abusin
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Cocoanut Cookie
Registered User
Join date: 26 Jan 2006
Posts: 1,741
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02-17-2006 09:02
From: Tod69 Talamasca And this extra tidbit for Guys: Black or White socks do NOT go well with shorts and sandals!!!! Geeeeyaaaahh!! if you want a lesson in Bad Fashion, go to a Walmart around 3 AM. Sleevless shirts, no teeth, Sports Team Baseball hat, looking like you just came from a hard day at the garage..... and that's just the women!!!! Hmmmm . . . I thought that wearing black socks with shorts and sandals was required attire for men over fifty. coco |
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Taco Rubio
also quite creepy
Join date: 15 Feb 2004
Posts: 3,349
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02-17-2006 09:10
I'm just happy to have an excuse for all my criminal activities  thank you!
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From: Torley Linden We can't be clear enough, ever, in our communication. 
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Gabe Lippmann
"Phone's ringing, Dude."
Join date: 14 Jun 2004
Posts: 4,219
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02-17-2006 09:23
This analysis only applies to the criminal failures. Suave, attractive criminals never get caught. It's part of the deal when you join the secret club for hot people.
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go to Nocturnal Threads 
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Zuzu Fassbinder
Little Miss No Tomorrow
Join date: 17 Sep 2004
Posts: 2,048
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02-17-2006 09:26
From: Taco Rubio I'm just happy to have an excuse for all my criminal activities thank you! You can stop eating twinkies now.
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From: Bud I don't want no commies in my car. No Christians either.
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Taco Rubio
also quite creepy
Join date: 15 Feb 2004
Posts: 3,349
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02-17-2006 10:12
From: Zuzu Fassbinder You can stop eating twinkies now. i fought the law, and i won.
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From: Torley Linden We can't be clear enough, ever, in our communication.
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Chip Midnight
ate my baby!
Join date: 1 May 2003
Posts: 10,231
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02-17-2006 10:45
From: Cocoanut Cookie Hmmmm . . . I thought that wearing black socks with shorts and sandals was required attire for men over fifty. Only if they use those little sock suspenders.
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 My other hobby: www.live365.com/stations/chip_midnight
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Cocoanut Cookie
Registered User
Join date: 26 Jan 2006
Posts: 1,741
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02-17-2006 11:28
From: Chip Midnight Only if they use those little sock suspenders. Gads - my husband's missing a vital accoutrement then! I'd better inform the dork forthwith! coco |
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Rickard Roentgen
Renaissance Punk
Join date: 4 Apr 2004
Posts: 1,869
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02-17-2006 12:15
In the NW, socks DO go with sandles.
<- quickly shaves to avoid a life of crime.
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Cherry Took
Mud Wrestling Champeeeen
Join date: 7 Jan 2005
Posts: 160
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02-17-2006 12:53
HAH. I LOVE this very interesting non-sequitor argument. Can I use it in my English 100 class as an example? Gorgeous From: Neehai Zapata Those of you who think underwear is optional are wrong. It is not optional.
People who do not wear underwear are single-handedly responsible for the decline of the American textiles industry. Why do you hate America?
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Love is all ya need
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Lianne Marten
Cheese Baron
Join date: 6 May 2004
Posts: 2,192
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02-17-2006 13:20
From: Rickard Roentgen In the NW, socks DO go with sandles. Actually.... they still don't. In the NW you shouldn't be wearing sandals at all.  |
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Sally Rosebud
the girl next door
Join date: 3 May 2005
Posts: 2,505
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02-17-2006 13:20
From: Rickard Roentgen In the NW, socks DO go with sandles.
Yeah, but that's thick wooly socks with Birki's!
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"I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?"
~Ernest Hemingway
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Sally Rosebud
the girl next door
Join date: 3 May 2005
Posts: 2,505
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02-17-2006 13:23
From: Lianne Marten In the NW you shouldn't be wearing sandals at all. Awww, you know it dries out around August!
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"I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?"
~Ernest Hemingway
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