ah Sunnen. What a kind reply...tearing up ( honestly im such a soft ass)
I want to take the Adobe Photoshop exam thats were my career lies I believe with it you have a certain amount of 'power' so thats my plan long term.
The reason why I was advised NOT to sign off totally was because in the UK to claim incapacity benefit you have to of paid enough national insurance contributions. I had upto the point of 1st getting sick. That was 5 yrs ago. So if I signed off now and for what ever reason, health or competition or SL ceasing to exsist they would go off this years tax & NA contributions and as I have been claiming sickness I havent paid enough.
So i would be forced to go onto Income support which is means tested...in other words my working partner would be considered as having enough income to support me.
So anyway...I declare Im doing permited work and work 16 hours a week and I get a year until my renewal evaluation comes round.
I do still suffer terrible days of health but its not an illness recognised by the NHS benzodiazepine addiction altho theres thousands of ppl suffering from it in the UK alone..if the NHS recognised it they would have serious compensation claims against docs who irresponsibily handed them out like candy.
I 'could' prolly get diagnosed with M.E easier then have that 'lable' they seem to need.
It is scary. I know I can find some work from home my strongest skill is marketing always has been but I'll NEVER enjoy it like I do making textures & learning Photoshop and other programs...I consider myself blessed and very lucky indeed.
I was a bad ass at school....but I always loved Art was the only qualification I came away with the rest I didnt even turn up for the exam ( was expelled LOL ) so to find myself in this position earning money from what set off as a game ( and dont get me wrong Im not making thousands here LOL but its enough to make a difference ) and I am truely happy.
Its done wonders for my dying self esteem..being sick at 33 and not able to leave the house to go to a regular 9-5 job plus the loss of what was a good income shattered me and not becuz of depression but because of the poisonous drugs the doc tossed at me as a 'quick fix' rather than offering me councelling.
Im over my anger and the 'why me' and have a long way to go b4 im free of that crap but SL has given me a purpose. And we all need that or we'd go insane.
BTW if any-one reads this who happens to be taking tranquilsors or anti depresants Xanax, Lithium, Valium. Diazepam. Triazepam, or any of the 'benzo' family and feel theyre having problems or its made them iller rather than better plz let me know in game I can direct you to a Yahoo group who are FANTASTIC a support & advise on coming off.
I also have tel numbers for CITA ( councilling for involantary tranquilisor addiction ) in the UK who talk to ppl all over the world but mainly US & UK.
Its a massive problem and many ppl dont even know theyre already hooked just suffering a series of various mental & physical illnesses and dont make the connection.

Id like to point you in the right direction if you would like advise.
Thanks for all youru replies guys...esp Sun my bud!
