Faking It

Do you sometimes fake your orgasm when you are intimate with your bf/partner/husband in sl?
Before you explode with another "NOT another Jig stupid question!" I mean to ask it with respect to you. After all, we DO have relationships here and we all seek teh human expression of pleasure and commitment. So we must consider our sl partners with teh same honesty that we offer our real partners.
BUT, do you feel the same pressures and circumstances of reality extending to you here - and why would taht be so when surely we should have NO barriers to climax here coz its built for freedom? And why there a need to fake it? Why not an honest "can't get it up" or "jus' not in the mood" instead of teh "old lies" (or new ones, as teh case may be)?
After all, there are so many of us who "to your scattered bodies go" each day and night. You could be a twenties "miss-know-it-all" whose dealing with real-world issues of back pain and mourning. Or a harrassed wife with two kids and an insensitive husband. Or a shy man, an outcast from his peers laughed at and gossiped about. Or you could be a man entering his 50s, 60s and even 70s who still feels youthful but is distracted and dismayed by a wife has lost teh passion of her youth. Or you could simply be lonely instead of alone. YET, when we get here, we bring our troubles with us. And we fake it.
Do you feel the same angst as in a real sexual experience that has failed in achieving climax? Or shrug it off with "well, its a game" or "she is in Tuktoyaktuk so who cares?" or "he's as useless as all of them! Men!"
On teh other hand, you could completely disagree and have NEVER faked in your life and have no need for any sex at all in SL despite what you heard in the tabloids. When you choose to fake you do it with a bedpartner.
Its just a question. Maybe it'll set you thinking or maybe not. Do you fake it? and why the pretence when all you are doing is "having sex" with an avatar?

I fake all my orgasms.

When I was with someone in SL, there were occasions when i was not 100 percent in the mood but he was all ready to go. I did fake sometimes and don't feel as bad as if it had been RL. There were probably times when I felt frisky and he was less so and I have no doubt that he faked it.

What's an orgasm?

Pep (I am asking on behalf of my wife)

There was one occasion, a long, long time ago at Bella Boardwalk where I faked it, partially. I was relatively new to SL then!

You didn't, did you!

Pep (Convinced me . . .)

Just checking something.

Always amusing when guys disparage their female partners for 'failure' to reach orgasm.

While there are always exceptions for one reason or another I have to say: Guys, if she has to fake it, you're either doing it wrong or she finds you icky. Get a good book, get an education, learn how to communicate.

hehehehehehe you go gf~!!!

I never fake it....oh, but I never do sex aka intimacy in SL....so I guess that doesn't answer your question. Would I fake it in SL? Hell yeah....are you fricken kidding me....I'd probably be multi-tasking all over the place while said partner was melting his keyboard.....I can't take virtual intimacy seriously enough to posibly get aroused. (I was a noob once, yeah, I tried it.....I laughed, I moved on) I can't get turned on if there's no physical presence of my partner, doesn't happen.

OMG Bella Boardwalk!! I went there as a newb too....those were the days lol

This is another of those Jig questions that get me thinking, rethinking, and wanting a lot more reply space than would be polite on the forums - and maybe wanting a research grant too.

I'll just respond with a few thoughts in no particular order.

SL is one of the few ways a guy *could* fake it. Not that we would want to -- it just takes a good deal longer as we guys age (which can be a good thing when you think about it).

Jig - just to clarify something in your post, older women do not necessailry lose the passion of their youth. They often finally begin gaining passion or at least a bit more drive. They can become more relaxed when they lose the ability for childbaring and the huge commitments involved.

Orgasm is not the be all end all of intimacy and simultaneous orgasm is very rare - almost a myth. There is no need to fake one in RL, but no need to feel bad about "faking" one in SL either. When my avatar walks, I am faking. The real me is still sitting in his chair. I think this is one of those fourth wall issues. People should not expect SL to be a complete refection of RL. Period.

Of course, what do I know? I'm in the never tried it, don't need to in SL camp.

^^ THIS!!!! is the laugh I needed all month! XD

Immy ( Thanks Pep! =^-^= )

I only found one avatar I was attracted too and never had any SL poseball intimacy with that avatar other than dancing. The excitement to me came through the visual creativity of how this person created their avatar and the person who was chatting with me.

Also, I think men are more visual than women. However, I have said some of the male model avatars I've seen in photos are quite sexy! Would I really find a 3D avatar sexy and exciting to be with if that male model came up to me and started showering my avatar with attention and wanted poseball attention? Answer: No. I'd prefer a real friend with stimulating conversation. SL is a lot visual and a lot just peeps wanting to win lindens at contests. I'm in a SL valley right now because a lot of SL is getting to be the same ol, same ol, if not every club playing the same songs fifty million times a week! I'm finding SL kind of boring right now and am looking for some SL clubs that perhaps talk about philosophy or other subjects I might be interested in. But I'm sure all SLifers go through there SL lulls from time to time.

As to your question of faking it, the other person wouldn't know whether a person was or wasn't.

I'm not really sure of the importance? For an ego thing?

QFT. Thanks Weston, very well thought out.

Jig, you seem to have many conflicting thoughts and feelings on male/female relationships. Often misunderstand what transpires between two people who share deep feelings between themselves.

As Weston pointed out, an orgasm may not always be needed to make a sexual session a positive experience although it certainly is desireable. There have been times when my BF and I are just too darn tired or in physical pain (back issues, whatever) to "complete" the act but that doesn't mean we didn't enjoy what transpired in trying to get there nor do we feel any pressure to pretend to orgasm to bolster the others ego. In fact, if anything, it winds up with the two of us laughing at how we're getting older and joking about what's going to happen when we're REALLY old? (we're only almost 50).

Additionally, I find for myself the older I get the better sex gets. When I was younger I wasn't as in touch with what was happening. Wasn't as verbal, able to express my needs and desires. They say a women reaches her sexual peak, I believe in her mid 40's? Well I'm nearly 50 and I feel like I'm going strong and see no end in sight. In fact, my BF has given me the nickname of "Trouble" lol. And I intend to keep that name for a long time to come.

As for how I was inworld? I won't go into much detail, but I never faked anything with my partners. I was always honest about what was happening, and expressed. They too, did the same. Currently I don't engage in SL sex since the man I met inworld has gone into a RL situation and we live together. No need for poseballs when we have the real thing.

Now, excuse me while I go cause some "trouble"

I actually had one of my absolutely best experiences in SL while just dancing with a guy in SL -- if the texting is there, the mind can supply the image.

Me to, I wonder if it was the same guy .. lol or girl.. At that point it really didn't matter.

Well, since the avatar is a fictional character, yeah, of course...

Sometimes I do base my avatar's responses on "personal response", but not always, and not even most of the time. Not to say it wasn't fun, but the skyrockets don't need to go off every time you enjoy a torrid paragraph in a romance novel, either.

I can have a perfectly enjoyable session with a friend over IM, while standing in a public place and Building for a client. A couple of my friends even prefer doing text trysts, since what we can do isn't limited by what pose balls and animations we happen to own.

I am in my mid 40s and seem to have more of a sex drive than I've had in the past 20 years. It could be that the kids finally all being gone from home plays a role in that.

So true - with texting abilities like that, I could care less what gender was at the keyboard or what they looked like in RL. Though I did make sure to get him on my friends list. I think that was the first time I ever was that intimate with someone on a first meeting in SL and the first time I ever immediately offered friendship.

Mine was sitting on Santas lap

(in SL! Had to clarify that!)

Of course.

Why should it be any different than Real Life?

Yep!