Fending off a Self Pity Attack...Memoirs from page 400

Jotted this down a week ago....'round about a page 400 or so....did not think it was needed.....


Feeling an attack of self pity coming on? Try this tomorrow.

Turn off the computer for a day.

Spend an hour with a friend who was just diagnosed with cancer...listening.

Spend an hour with an elderly person who hasn't had a visitor in 4 weeks....listening.

Spend an hour with a family member or friend you've neglected....listening.

Spend an hour with someone who has just lost a loved one....listening.

Spend an hour at the local food bank....helping....listening.

Spend an hour at the homeless shelter....helping....listening.

Spend an hour at the unemployment office....watching.

Spend an hour at the animal shelter....watching.

Spend an hour with a friend in the surgery waiting room of a hospital....just being.

It's not about YOU, today. It's really not about YOU any day.

If you do just one of those things tomorrow....you probably won't find a reason to wallow in your own self pity for a long while. Just one of those hours can bring you back to your senses for months.....trust me on this.

After you've spent your hour with the above people.....please don't tell them you won't be back tomorrow because you have to spend that time on unresolved personal issues in your "virtual life." Keep that to yourself.

And don't you dare whine about how you can't muster up the strength to do just one of the above....those of us who are one or more of the above.....muster it up just fine....and manage just fine. Most of us don't want to hear it.....and some of us consider it a slap in the face.

Err...thanks?

If you want to be cured of self-pity, just read the blog on the SLProfiles website for some aversion therapy!

Good advice for life in general, it can get pretty self indulgent here and things can matter more than they should. I'm amazed how cut off the real world can become for me after an hour or 2 online.

This doesn't work with me. My reaction to any of these things when I have felt down is "now I truely know life expletive deleteds." Yes, others have it worse than me. The proof has just stared me in the face. We are all losers. Besides, why should any one who feels down be expected to do pennance? Misery loves company.

What has worked or what used to work was a walk through the fanciest neighborhood within walking distance, especially around the holidays or when gardens are blooming in spring. See those gorgeous houses and well manictured yards and think: "I may not have that but at least someone does. I may be a loser, but at least there are winners. That means somehow the game is winnable." This worked before the bottom fell out of the housing market. It really made me feel better to know someone out there had it good even if I didn't.

There is nothing worse than a rigged game where everyone loses.

There was also a shadenfruede game I played with the fancy houses. I'd look at those houses and think: "I bet I eat better than they do." This was probably so, since I am a bit of a gourmand, and cooking is one of my loves.

Then there was the Cedars, a plantation, where the same family had lived since the 1800's. I can trace my ancestry back to the 18th Century. I'm a direct descendent of a very famous rabbi. I'd look at the Cedars and laugh my head off.

Scenes of success are what lift the depressed and a little positive comparison can't hurt.

I have, on occasion, squinted up my face in a hammy version of contempt and hissed "those grapes are SOUR!" in the direction of the fancy houses along my walk to work. Then I laugh and move on. Anyone up and around at that hour then gets to think I'm a lunatic. *ahem* Whatever gets you through the day and doesn't hurt anybody.

you guys are going about it all wrong. what a negative approach.

every day you wake up alive, the rest is just gravy. now that's positive!

No we aren't.

That's sometimes easier to remember if you get a bit of perspective.

I see your negativity and raise you a bit of cynicism.

I'll see your cynisism and raise you apathy and jadedness.

Is Jadedness a word?

I dunno. I really can't be bothered to look it up.

I'll see those and raise you a pair of pants:

Call.

*whips off those pants and waves them in salute.

That does nothing for a person with depression induced self-pity.

Lulz. Poor Brenda. She goes through at least 5 pairs a week.

True. Depression is a serious medical problem. Maybe we should add to the original list if none of the above makes you realize how lucky you are, seek professional medical guidance.

Who said those people I listed are "downers?" Why would one assume that? Because they react to some struggles the same way as you do? They all don't. I'm thinking of some people I know on that list....not a downer or a loser among them. Quite the contrary....Positive as they come, even in spite of some things.



I live in one of those houses on one of those streets. Newsflash. The people inside those houses experience illness and grief and struggles, too. It's not the house that is going to determine whether they are a winner in life or not....it's how they attack and survive the same exact struggles that you have.....that will determine that. You think a house is going to make you happy if you pack up the all the same baggage and move into it?

ROFLMAO at the previous exchange. And I didn't even get a chance to place a bet!

Ah well...

/me shuffles and deals the cards for the next round.