Remembering in Second Life

Hi everyone,

I'm pretty new to Second Life, but i'm very interested in how it functions as a community. I am currently researching for my cultural studies thesis which I am actually writing about Second Life. The question that I would love some answers to is 'what role do you think the act of remembrance plays in Second Life as a virtual community?' And even more specifically, 'why do you think so many memorials are built in Second Life?'

Any responses would be very much appreciated.... Thank you!

This is different, and as someone who has recently gone through a ton of personal loss, I'll be happy to answer.

I spend a LOT of time in SL. (My name is Honey, and I'm a SLalcoholic.) My mother in law died April 1, my house burned with two of my pets in it on April 12, and my father died on May 31. I also lost a SL friend on June 3 to cancer.

After my mother in law's death, I put up a memorial garden on my sim, and built a headstone for her and my brother in law who died 3 years ago. Since then, I added headstones for the pets, and for my dad, and there's a plaque on the wall for my friend.

In the quiet moments of the day, I go to the memorial and spend time with them, and being there gives me a calm and strength that I need to get through my very busy days.

Memorials are built to give honor to those who have passed...and I like to think that my family and friends are all looking down on me when I'm there with them, happy that I'm spending time with them.

That's sort of like referring to a bucket as a system, but go on ..



I've seen it not just here but in other virtual environments too. Memorials are exactly that - for the living. Since so much time is often spent in SL and other virtual spaces, its an opportuity for people to be remembered in ways that might not be physically possible in RL, or visited nearly as often if someone lives in a distant part of the world from the physical memorial.

I couldn't be at the hospital while my mother was dying due to surgery so I waited it out in SL in a space I built as a memorial to her. After she died, I created a flaming circle with a rose in it as her memorial. It helped me through a very bad and sad time.

SL has had a huge effect on my RL life, painful but in the end very very good. I have learned things about myself here I would never have been able to learn in RL although at the time I had no idea of how the freedom in SL was affecting me.

I really wish that this aspect of SL, as a valuable tool for self knowledge was more a part of the public presentation of SL.

If I lost a loved one in RL, I don't think Second Life would be the first place I'd think of to place a memorial although it's a nice touch and a worthwhile thing to do. However, if I lost an SL friend whose RL died, I might have one.

One odd thought crossed my mind. I wonder if people have ever created avatars and virtual personas resembling someone close to them who's died. It's kind-of spooky to think that but I'd imagine it's been done and it might even be comforting to some people to do that.

Add a chatbot program from something like pandorabots that has been tought to speak and behave like and preferbly by the person who has deceased and you could rather creepily bring ppl back from the dead.

There is some suggestion by eminent technology commentators like Ray Krzweill that, in a few years time computers will be so advanced that we will be able to download our brains ie. personalities and experience into them and thus continue to live after we have ceased to exist in the physical sense.

Personally I think it's all a bit creepy.

There's a few movies along a similar theme - Solaris and "Until the end of the world". Until the end of the world has a number of concepts in it the are rather similiar in a way to secnod life - somebody invents a machine that records and allows you to see your dreams and see and experiecnce your dead friends and relatives everybody gets addicted to the machine and drops out of RL sound familiar? *grins*

Sorry a bit off topic, but also not in a way

It's a lot more lucrative for LL to present SL's value as a corporate tool, and more lucrative for the media to show the converse of your idea, SL as an evil tool for self destruction.

Darn it.

I lost my mother and several family members with a 2 week period when I first joined the community of SL. I became a building addict as a way to keep my mind off of things and stay mentally challenged. While I was building and creating I was always thinking about my lost family and things they enjoyed and liked and used that in my creations. I finally went ahead and built a small church with attached cemetary. Placed headstones as way to remember them in the virtual world.

I have had several residents ask for headstones also and began putting them up for residents. It was a joy sharing their stories about loved ones and how, even as adults, we are saddened by loss of parents and friends and think about our own mortality. It please so much to hear how people appreciate this function and when I stop by I am always blown away by the avatars visiting their family memorials and just hanging out.

It was great for my healing and gave me a way to see real people behind our cartoon avatars.

One of the attractions of building memorials in SL is that it is a good place to think and reflect. It is also cheap and easy to build something beautiful, throw your heart into it, and enjoy it.

These places can be very popular.

The most disappointing thing I have ever seen is a memorial to the victims of one of the mass shootings at a college in the US, it too was very popular, but it was used simply to gain traffic for an estate manager's main point of sale for land.

Cappy, I really, really, REALLY suggest you look up Aura Lily in-world and talk to her. Seriously.

This thread is making me think- I have never been much on memorials- even in RL. I find that the memory is internal and have needed an outward representation.

I can understand the need though, and see it as a wonderful outlet for the loss. A way to cope and understand and deal.


I enjoyed your take particularly and is what is causing the most reflection on my part.

UGH! That's even too Cynical for me

i run this memorial in cassandra for members of sl that have passed rl..it is free you just have to give me there name and few nice words on a notecard and ill make the plaque for you also have just recently added a section for our friends from rl that have passed that never played sl.i do this because weve lost a ton of friends here and they need to be remembered..please im me in world with questions

Yup that's what Eshi Otawara did... created an avatar resembling her husband, who passed away in April 2006.

http://nwn.blogs.com/nwn/2008/05/the-husband-tha.html