Parade of Silly Questions

I'm in the mood for a laugh, so in the grand tradition of books and websites like Hey Idiot! and notalwaysright.com, what's the funniest thing you've heard from a customer or merchant?

I keep notecards of the most amusing ones of mine, like these:

Once I had a random person become quite angry with me because I sold gender-neutral avatars (small animals with no way to distinguish sexes) in a vendor that had no "genderless" option, so I had it default to male for anything genderless. This person proclaimed this to be sexist and demanded I change it, even after I explained I didn't have mod rights to the script, and wouldn't know what to do about it even if I did. They then went on to berate the script writer. They never actually bought anything from me.

One person messaged me saying they bought a hat but it didn't fit their avatar. Confused about what they expected me to do about it, since I didn't make the item, I simply said "Adjust the hat." They replied with an "ok thanks" and I never heard from them again.

Recently I got a message that simply stated the person bought an avatar from me and didn't like its eyes, so they were deleting it. I recognized the name as one that had been banned from my home sim cluster for being a nuisance, and checked my sales records to see if they had actually bought anything. They had, but it was almost two months prior. No real criticism was given, just a comment on something that can be clearly seen from the vendor image and has a scripted style change, with no comment on how to make it "better". Besides waiting two months to comment on it.

Not so much from customers, but from some people.

In the old days of Ratings, you would have a building rating ("Building: +10" or similar) on your Profile. One new user once asked me how he could make this go up from 0, so that he would be allowed to build more than a plywood cube.

For a while, my avatar had a little placard with the word "Pervert!" on it under my skirt, so that anyone who cammed there would see it - but it wasn't visible from any other angle. Somebody asked me, in open chat, in the middle of an event, where I got it from.

But, I haven't had many problems with customers, fortunately

"Your English is really hard to understand, where do you come from?"

(This was from a customer - and _I am English_.)

"I got it from the idiot store. Perhaps you could buy a brain while you're there?"

George, the ocean called, they're running out of shrimp!

I was building a skyclub structure in privately owned sandbox, way up in the sky. A few-day-old new resident found his way up to the club and was quite chatty and was very interested in learning to build so I took the time to demonstrate a few functions. He hung around for ages and eventually it was time for me to go. He explained that I must clear the club away, like the rules stated. As I cleared away, not all the bits were linked and as I went round finding the unlinked bits, the newbie was telling me he was watching carefully because if I left any bits he'd report me to the owner or even ban me himself because the owner had given him banning rights too!

A newb wandered into my store and said into chat, "hi, what's your name?"

LOL

for some reason i'm crying over this comment, thats great

i'v never had any really strange customers. i did meet a lovely japanese girl the other night tho, she was standing on top of a building i was creating and asked if i could script her cap to be smaller. she promptly changed into a freebie SLPD uniform with a hat that was deffinatly to large for her head. i got her to transfer it to me, re-sized it and sent it back then tought her how to move items on her body and use the camera (also obviously explained scripts weren't needed to re-size and move things).

she was very happy and then informed me she was part of the japanese second life police department and was putting my name down on her notepad as a good resident. i smiled, said thanks and bade her goodbye.

the odd thing was she was almost 12 months old. must have been an old account. were friends now so i'm sure i'll see her again

-Crunch

Did I miss The point of this thread or not? But..... I had this bloke come in the other day who had horns!!! no prob. When he had rezzed .I said in chat " nice horns" just to break the ice. After a while this guy went on about how he was a vampire and he could bite me if he wanted.LOL . I said " but then I will orbit you".response was "what is an orbit?" checked his profile and he was super new,figured that.Then this guy went on to bore me with this stupid vampire spiel.Snooze or what. Tp'd away and banned the fool. What a frigging loony.But I am all right now.

It's for giggles. I recently finished reading the archives of notalwaysright.com and wanted more



I'm glad I put down my Dr Pepper before reading that! What gets me about people that do that is the default option is usually to display names for a while before fading them, and it may be always on by default now, I'm not sure. Yet still people will rez right next to someone, and ask their name!

*Random person*: Why do you have a tail and ear's?
Me: Cus' I'm a neko.
*random person*: What's a neko?
Me: A person with a cattail and ear's.
*Random person*: Like a furry?
Me: No.
*Random person*: Lol furfag *Tp's away*
Me: *Quickly distracted by feline curiosity*

Oh my! LOL

How about the obnoxious but still funny ones, such as the folks (all relatively new) who showed up all blinged-out gangsta-griefer style and ordered me to rent them a sim for free and they'd pay later? They tried to "gang up" on me by bringing more avatars from their group. So it took longer to eject and ban them.

While I was ejecting and banning one of them said to the other ones that I was certainly rude, but she would be willing do business with me again in the future. I about laughed until I cried on that one.

I was greeting a new house renter recently, and said you have 1000 prims allowance here.. she said what?? I said you have 1000 prims that you can use to set up your house... She said.. oh where is the house (we were standing in it)

Another IMed me saying DID YOU RETURN ALL MY POSE BALLS... i said ummm no.. YOU HAD TO OF THERE ALL GONE!! I said well did u try typing /1 show?? she said oh ty.. not another word

I get a lot of people who just come in and say
HI
i say "HI" back to them and
the conversations ends.

It always leaves me asking WTF was that?

"..THERE ALL GONE!!"
"Ah, no WONDER you are female!"


I've gotten the "What's your name?" before, it downright baffles me!