The Joke Thread.

Hey, seeing as SL is down..... I thought we could have some fun by starting a joke thread, just post some funny jokes, and let others read and comment on em
Heres mine : There was a red man, and he was in his house, taking a shower when the door bell rang, he got out of the shower, wrapped a towel around himself, and went downstairs, he opened the door, and there was a little green girl, suddenly, the red mans dog came and ripped off his towel, leaving the man naked, the little green girl screamed, and ran off, she went across the road, and a car ran over her, and she died.
Now, whats the moral of the story? .... ... .. . Dont cross the road when the red man is flashing!

SL is a trademark now

1.19 is more stable then the grid

Bump

thats not funny, anyway shouldn't that be in the pregnancy thread?

I thought this was a thread about LL's tech department.

Is this? BUMP BUMP

Bee Gees
I Started A Joke



I started a joke, which started the whole world crying,
but I didn't see that the joke was on me, oh no.

I started to cry, which started the whole world laughing,
oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
and I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.

Til I finally died, which started the whole world living,
oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was on me.

I looked at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
and I fell out of bed, hurting my head from things that I'd said.

'Til I finally died, which started the whole world living,
oh, if I'd only seen that the joke was one me.

(a-wa) O kodwa u zo-nge li-sa namhlange
(a-wa a-wa) Si-bona kwenze ka kanjani
(a-wa a-wa) Amanto mbazane ayeza
She's a rich girl
She don't try to hide it,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,

He's a poor boy,
Empty as a pocket
Empty as a pocket with nothing to lose
Sing Ta na na
Ta na na na
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
ta na na
Ta na na na
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,

(Pause)

People say she's crazy
She got diamonds on the soles of her shoes,
Well that's one way to lose these
Walking blues,
Diamonds on the soles of her shoes,

She was physically forgotten
but then she, slipped into my pocket
With my car keys,
She said you've taken me for granted
Because I please you
Wearing these dia-monds,

And I could say Oo oo oo,
As if everybody knows
What I'm talking about,
As if everybody here would know
Exactly what I was talking about,
Talking about diamonds on the soles of her shoes,

(Pause)

She makes the sign of a teaspoon
He makes the sign of a wave,
The poor boy changes clothes
And puts on after-shave,
To compensate for his ordinary shoes,

And she said honey take me dancing
But they ended up by sleeping
In a doorway,
By the bodegas and the lights on
Upper Broadway,
Wearing diamonds on the soles of their shoes,

And I could say Oo oo oo
and if everybody here would know
What I was talking about
I mean everybody here would know exactly
What I was talking about
Talking about diamonds,

(Pause)

People say I'm crazy
I got diamonds on the soles of my shoes yeah,
Well that's one way to lose
These walking blues,
diamonds on the soles of my shoes,

ta na na na
ta na na na na
ta na na na
ta na na na na
(to finish)

Why did the resident sell his 2048 meter flat green mature mainland?

To lower his tier!


(Sorry, an in-joke for land barons).

But is it REALLY flat?

No! It was disguised with a grass texture prim platform. That's the joke!

Fat Charlie the Archangel
Sliped into the room
He said I have no opinion about this
And I have no opinion about that
Sad as a lonely little wrinkled balloon
He said well I don't claim to be happy about this, boys
And I don't seem to be happy about that

I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of this crazy love

She says she knows about jokes
This time the joke is on me
Well, I have no opinion about that
And I have no opinion about me

Somebody could walk into this room
And say your life is on fire
It's all over the evening news
All about the fire in your life
On the evening news

I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love
I don't want no part of this crazy love
I don't want no part of your love

Fat Charlie the Archangel
Files for divorce
He says well this will eat up a year of my life
And then there's all that weight to be lost
She says the joke is on me
I say the joke is on her
I said I have no opinion about that
Well, we'll just have to wait and confer

What do you call 20 Lindens jumping from an airplane...

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Skeet!

Paul Simon songs for $400 please, Alex.

Since i'm from the south, i figure i can tell this joke:

Two northerners were driving in the south in the middle of the night and got pulled over by a county sheriff. The sheriff walks up to the drivers side..taps on the window with his night stick and the driver rolls down the window. The sheriff then whacks the driver on the head. The driver exclaims "What was that for"? The Sheriff then says " You in my county now son, and when you get pulled over, you have your window down, liscense and registration out and both hands on the wheel..." The Sheriff then walks over to the passengers side and taps on the window. The passenger rolls down his window and the Sheriff whacks him with the nightstick too. The passenger exclaims "What was that for"? The Sheriff says " I just made your wish come true" The passenger seems confused and the Sheriff continues..." When you two get about 3 or 4 miles down the road and you say " I wish that SOB would have hit me like that"

Hope you enjoy it..

Don't you have to ask a question in RA?

Ah, I just have...

Ok - how about this....

What is the difference between a doctor and God?

When God kills you, it isn't a mistake?

The Havoc4 Beta team

God doesn't think He is a Doctor.

What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a Pitt Bull?
Lipstick

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife She
was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching,
so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys
applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought
long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to
hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the
house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long
hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of
them worked hard and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the
rancher's widow said 'You have done a really good job, and the ranch
looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels.'

The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night. He
returned around 2:30 am, and upon entering the room, he found the
rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting
for him. She quietly called him over to her. 'Unbutton my blouse and
take it off,' she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. 'Now take
off my boots.' He did as she asked, ever so slowly. 'Now take off my
socks.' He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.
'Now take off my skirt.' He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching
her eyes in the firelight. 'Now take off my bra.' Again, with
trembling hands did as he was told and dropped it to the floor. 'Now
take off my panties'. Again he obeyed.

Then she looked at him and said: 'If you ever wear my clothes into
town again, you're fired!'

Dearly Darlings,

What is the difference between a comedy and a tragedy?
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Six inches




You all have a lovely Saturday!

Ever Yours,

Mrs. Showdog Tiger