Second Life Forums Archive - An unexpected reaction...

Bellissa Dion

Fringe Dweller

Join date: 5 Jun 2005

Posts: 183

12-03-2007 03:20

Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland.

What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request:

"Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated

"

I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal.

~B

Gummi Richthofen

Fetish's Frasier Crane!

Join date: 3 Oct 2006

Posts: 605

12-03-2007 03:32

My experience of SL celebs is that they are very burned out. You can expect their conversation to be presumptuous, and that you will have to show considerable effort before they will realise that you ain't just another gosh-gee-whiz newbie. If I was in the position you relate, I'd reply with "...so that's a no then?", and let the dice fall as they may.

In my experience, the nature of prim disuptes in land management is extensively soured because the Lindens themselves set a very low example, when it comes to sweeping up other people's mess: there's not enough mechanisms in the environment to allow for these regular housekeeping issues.

Bellissa Dion

Fringe Dweller

Join date: 5 Jun 2005

Posts: 183

Not the issue at all...

12-03-2007 03:38

it was the reaction I received to the request I made. It had more to do with the request and how I put it than the actual issue of 'garbage collection'. The majority of the conversation was a lesson on manners and i simply do not know why or what I said to get such a reaction because it was all based around what i quoted in my first post.

Sally Silvera

live music maniac

Join date: 17 Feb 2007

Posts: 2,325

12-03-2007 03:43

Hi Belissa and sorry you had a bad experience.

Problem is though...... we don't know what this person said, so it's hard to comment on their reaction.

Your request certainly doesn't seem to warrant a rude reply IMHO.

My advice would be to shrug it off and move on to be honest. People can be rude everywhere.

Best of luck.

_____________________

Claire Silverspar

Pokes Badgers With Spoons

Join date: 31 Oct 2007

Posts: 5,375

12-03-2007 04:02

I honestly cannot see anything wrong with your original post. You seemed to be very polite. Unfortunately some people tend to be rude and take things the wrong way, it is sometimes hard to put across what you mean in text. They may have taken it in completely the opposite way to which you meant it. Though I still cannot see how that would be taken wrongly.
Without knowing exactly what she said, it would be hard to know what they took offense at.
i would just take Sally's advise and let it go. There is no point in wasting energy over something like this. Learn from it (that people can be rude) and move on.

I hope you have better experiences in future

_____________________

I'll miss this damn place.
I'll be over at SCII after the end has come.

Chris Norse

Loud Arrogant Redneck

Join date: 1 Oct 2006

Posts: 5,735

12-03-2007 05:21

If it is who I think it is, I had a problem with her helpers. They did not understand that if they set their landscaping to group they could turn on autoreturn. So I go to IM them daily as idiots would leave all kinds of stuff on the sim in front of me. Once for 3 days the whole sim burned with prim fire.

_____________________

I'm going to pick a fight
William Wallace, Braveheart

“Rules are mostly made to be broken and are too often for the lazy to hide behind”
Douglas MacArthur

FULL

Isabeau Imako

P'tite Poulette

Join date: 13 Sep 2007

Posts: 2,335

12-03-2007 05:44

Was this request done in person during "business" hours or sent on a notecard? Is this one of many requests? We just don't know enough about the history between you two. As difficult as it may be, breathe and move on (in both senses of the word). 2nd Life's too short

Xplorer Cannoli

Cache Cleaner

Join date: 18 Sep 2005

Posts: 1,131

12-03-2007 06:35

From: Isabeau Imako

Was this request done in person during "business" hours or sent on a notecard? Is this one of many requests? We just don't know enough about the history between you two. As difficult as it may be, breathe and move on (in both senses of the word). 2nd Life's too short

well said.

Sometimes you do not know what is going on behind the other avatar that day. Maybe they just got done with someone IM'ing them over something trivial and then got your IM. Maybe their husband or wife is on the other side hollering for them to get off the computer? You just never know.

_____________________

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3Ring Binder

always smile

Join date: 8 Mar 2007

Posts: 15,028

12-03-2007 07:14

From: Bellissa Dion

Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland.

What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request:

"Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated

"

I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal.

~B

well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land.

next time, just put up a wall.

Sling Trebuchet

Deleted User

Join date: 20 Jan 2007

Posts: 4,548

12-03-2007 07:53

From: 3Ring Binder

well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land.

next time, just put up a wall.

"you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land"
Or an alternative interpretation:
'you brought to their attention something that they might have overlooked and which was devaluing their rentals'

Unfortunately, RL and SL are both full of insecure angry people whose lives suck bigtime. Anything that they can possible interpret as a personal attack will be responded to as such. Their sorry lives lead them to expect attack.
These people are minefields.

The worst possible thing to do with this sort is to mention something that they themselves realise is a issue. For that, they go totally and blindly apeshit.

_____________________

Maggie: We give our residents a lot of tools, to build, create, and manage their lands and objects. That flexibility also requires people to exercise judgment about when things should be used.
http://www.ace-exchange.com/home/story/BDVR/589

Travis Lambert

White dog, red collar

Join date: 3 Jun 2004

Posts: 2,819

12-03-2007 07:55

"Well known SL personality" does not always equal "Professional", "Caring" or "Kind". (Although it often does, just like most SL residents are often professional, caring and/or kind).

My advice: Be persistant. If it was an underling that communicated to you this way, try to remain professional, and escalate to someone higher - or someone else on their same team.

If that still gets you nowhere, try filling a professionally-worded support request. If the 'junk' objects are not owned by the landowner, and the items are *clearly* junk, sometimes a sympathetic Liason will help you - or even contact the landowner on your behalf.

Good Luck!

_____________________

------------------
The Shelter

The Shelter is a non-profit recreation center for new residents, and supporters of new residents. Our goal is to provide a positive & supportive social environment for those looking for one in our overwhelming world.

Oryx Tempel

Registered User

Join date: 8 Nov 2006

Posts: 7,663

12-03-2007 09:37

Breathe deeply.

If this person wants to have ugly rentals, it's his/her loss. I would have been upset too at such a rude reply but oh well, you know?

_____________________

Tarina Sewell

Just Browsing Thank you

Join date: 20 Jul 2007

Posts: 2,180

12-03-2007 10:08

From: Bellissa Dion

Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland.

What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request:

"Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated

"

I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal.

~B

You can't return them yourself?

Okiphia Rayna

DemonEye Benefactor

Join date: 22 Sep 2007

Posts: 2,103

12-03-2007 10:10

From: Tarina Sewell

You can't return them yourself?

OP doesn't own the land or objects far as I understand it. The parcel has become kinda messy and the OP was kindly asking if the owner could clean it up a little.

Please tell me if I'm incorrect, I think I understood the post but unsure

_____________________

Owner of DemonEye Designs Custom Building and Landscaping
Owner and Blogger, Okiphia's Life
http://okiphiablog.blogspot.com/

Chas Connolly

Registered User

Join date: 24 Jan 2007

Posts: 1,433

12-03-2007 10:17

From: 3Ring Binder

well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land.

next time, just put up a wall.

Wow, get out of bed the wrong side the morning?

Perhaps you like seeing a pile up of junk on all the parcels around you as litter-bugs, not the owners themselves, seem to have a sixth sense for build-enabled plots. I've pointed this out in a friendly manner to several neighbours and those that have replied have been quite happy to turn on auto return, as they were blissfully unaware that junk was piling up on plots they never visit.

_____________________

Logic : The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding - The Devil's Dictionary

Zepar Zhukovsky

Leveraging Confusion

Join date: 24 Oct 2006

Posts: 66

12-03-2007 11:10

"Please excuse my interruption 'large landowner'. /me debases self. I come before your holiness to beg a question. There is a residential rental in 'aSim' that your Grace has set to "anyone can build". Knowing that you are infallible omnipotent one, I suspect one of your minions has failed to do your bidding. Would it be possible for you to send a servant to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only so that the land will continue to reflect your perfection? I would be most grateful and will sacrifice a goat or even a new calf to you at the next quarter moon. /me debases self again and awaits your answer."

Actually, I don't think there was much wrong with what you said but It was this sentence

"Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy."

that produced the response.

FD Spark

Prim & Texture Doodler

Join date: 30 Oct 2006

Posts: 4,697

12-03-2007 11:51

Maybe it is intentional including the rudeness for you to sell the land to them? It seems like some people do this as intentional legal act of grief type activity because they know they can.

_____________________

Look for my alt Dagon Xanith on Youtube.com

Newest video is

Loneliness by Duo Zikr DX's Alts & SL Art Death of Avatar

An unexpected reaction...
Bellissa Dion Fringe Dweller Join date: 5 Jun 2005 Posts: 183	12-03-2007 03:20 Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland. What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request: "Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated " I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal. ~B
Gummi Richthofen Fetish's Frasier Crane! Join date: 3 Oct 2006 Posts: 605	12-03-2007 03:32 My experience of SL celebs is that they are very burned out. You can expect their conversation to be presumptuous, and that you will have to show considerable effort before they will realise that you ain't just another gosh-gee-whiz newbie. If I was in the position you relate, I'd reply with "...so that's a no then?", and let the dice fall as they may. In my experience, the nature of prim disuptes in land management is extensively soured because the Lindens themselves set a very low example, when it comes to sweeping up other people's mess: there's not enough mechanisms in the environment to allow for these regular housekeeping issues.
Bellissa Dion Fringe Dweller Join date: 5 Jun 2005 Posts: 183	Not the issue at all... 12-03-2007 03:38 it was the reaction I received to the request I made. It had more to do with the request and how I put it than the actual issue of 'garbage collection'. The majority of the conversation was a lesson on manners and i simply do not know why or what I said to get such a reaction because it was all based around what i quoted in my first post.
Sally Silvera live music maniac Join date: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 2,325	12-03-2007 03:43 Hi Belissa and sorry you had a bad experience. Problem is though...... we don't know what this person said, so it's hard to comment on their reaction. Your request certainly doesn't seem to warrant a rude reply IMHO. My advice would be to shrug it off and move on to be honest. People can be rude everywhere. Best of luck. _____________________
Claire Silverspar Pokes Badgers With Spoons Join date: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 5,375	12-03-2007 04:02 I honestly cannot see anything wrong with your original post. You seemed to be very polite. Unfortunately some people tend to be rude and take things the wrong way, it is sometimes hard to put across what you mean in text. They may have taken it in completely the opposite way to which you meant it. Though I still cannot see how that would be taken wrongly. Without knowing exactly what she said, it would be hard to know what they took offense at. i would just take Sally's advise and let it go. There is no point in wasting energy over something like this. Learn from it (that people can be rude) and move on. I hope you have better experiences in future _____________________ I'll miss this damn place. I'll be over at SCII after the end has come.
Chris Norse Loud Arrogant Redneck Join date: 1 Oct 2006 Posts: 5,735	12-03-2007 05:21 If it is who I think it is, I had a problem with her helpers. They did not understand that if they set their landscaping to group they could turn on autoreturn. So I go to IM them daily as idiots would leave all kinds of stuff on the sim in front of me. Once for 3 days the whole sim burned with prim fire. _____________________ I'm going to pick a fight William Wallace, Braveheart “Rules are mostly made to be broken and are too often for the lazy to hide behind” Douglas MacArthur FULL
Isabeau Imako P'tite Poulette Join date: 13 Sep 2007 Posts: 2,335	12-03-2007 05:44 Was this request done in person during "business" hours or sent on a notecard? Is this one of many requests? We just don't know enough about the history between you two. As difficult as it may be, breathe and move on (in both senses of the word). 2nd Life's too short
Xplorer Cannoli Cache Cleaner Join date: 18 Sep 2005 Posts: 1,131	12-03-2007 06:35 From: Isabeau Imako Was this request done in person during "business" hours or sent on a notecard? Is this one of many requests? We just don't know enough about the history between you two. As difficult as it may be, breathe and move on (in both senses of the word). 2nd Life's too short well said. Sometimes you do not know what is going on behind the other avatar that day. Maybe they just got done with someone IM'ing them over something trivial and then got your IM. Maybe their husband or wife is on the other side hollering for them to get off the computer? You just never know. _____________________ Region Names for a Themed Shopping Experience: New Region: Gifts Accessories, Art, Avatars, Cars, Clothes, Clothing, Fashion, Fashions, Furnishings, Furniture, Gadgets, Games, Gifts, Hair, Jewellery, Jewelry, Mall, Men, Money, Music, Pets, Shoes, Shopping, Skin, Skins, Something, Women, X Attractions: Explore our new park at HOME New Racetrack at CAR WEAPONS Region Now Open!
3Ring Binder always smile Join date: 8 Mar 2007 Posts: 15,028	12-03-2007 07:14 From: Bellissa Dion Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland. What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request: "Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated " I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal. ~B well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land. next time, just put up a wall.
Sling Trebuchet Deleted User Join date: 20 Jan 2007 Posts: 4,548	12-03-2007 07:53 From: 3Ring Binder well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land. next time, just put up a wall. "you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land" Or an alternative interpretation: 'you brought to their attention something that they might have overlooked and which was devaluing their rentals' Unfortunately, RL and SL are both full of insecure angry people whose lives suck bigtime. Anything that they can possible interpret as a personal attack will be responded to as such. Their sorry lives lead them to expect attack. These people are minefields. The worst possible thing to do with this sort is to mention something that they themselves realise is a issue. For that, they go totally and blindly apeshit. _____________________ Maggie: We give our residents a lot of tools, to build, create, and manage their lands and objects. That flexibility also requires people to exercise judgment about when things should be used. http://www.ace-exchange.com/home/story/BDVR/589
Travis Lambert White dog, red collar Join date: 3 Jun 2004 Posts: 2,819	12-03-2007 07:55 "Well known SL personality" does not always equal "Professional", "Caring" or "Kind". (Although it often does, just like most SL residents are often professional, caring and/or kind). My advice: Be persistant. If it was an underling that communicated to you this way, try to remain professional, and escalate to someone higher - or someone else on their same team. If that still gets you nowhere, try filling a professionally-worded support request. If the 'junk' objects are not owned by the landowner, and the items are clearly junk, sometimes a sympathetic Liason will help you - or even contact the landowner on your behalf. Good Luck! _____________________ ------------------ The Shelter The Shelter is a non-profit recreation center for new residents, and supporters of new residents. Our goal is to provide a positive & supportive social environment for those looking for one in our overwhelming world.
Oryx Tempel Registered User Join date: 8 Nov 2006 Posts: 7,663	12-03-2007 09:37 Breathe deeply. If this person wants to have ugly rentals, it's his/her loss. I would have been upset too at such a rude reply but oh well, you know? _____________________
Tarina Sewell Just Browsing Thank you Join date: 20 Jul 2007 Posts: 2,180	12-03-2007 10:08 From: Bellissa Dion Well I don't usually do this but feel the need to get opinions on a request that was made to a very well known SL personality who proceeded to basically tell me I was rude, demanding and pretty much went ballistic. Obviously i can't put the conversation here, that is not the issue (although I assure you my end of the conversation remained as per the request). For reference sake, the sim in question is mainland. What I would like to know is what others opinions are on this request: "Hello 'large landowner'. You have a residential rental in 'MySim' that's set to anyone can build. Would it be possible for someone to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only? Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy. Would be much appreciated " I'm afraid I'm a little upset by the resulting conversation and I guess need to hear from others to be sure I'm not blind to whatever caused the reaction I received. I hate upsetting people but this just seemed to be oh so over the top and surreal. ~B You can't return them yourself?
Okiphia Rayna DemonEye Benefactor Join date: 22 Sep 2007 Posts: 2,103	12-03-2007 10:10 From: Tarina Sewell You can't return them yourself? OP doesn't own the land or objects far as I understand it. The parcel has become kinda messy and the OP was kindly asking if the owner could clean it up a little. Please tell me if I'm incorrect, I think I understood the post but unsure _____________________ Owner of DemonEye Designs Custom Building and Landscaping Owner and Blogger, Okiphia's Life http://okiphiablog.blogspot.com/
Chas Connolly Registered User Join date: 24 Jan 2007 Posts: 1,433	12-03-2007 10:17 From: 3Ring Binder well, i don't think overreacting is a good thing, but at the same time, you asked someone to change their policy on THEIR land. next time, just put up a wall. Wow, get out of bed the wrong side the morning? Perhaps you like seeing a pile up of junk on all the parcels around you as litter-bugs, not the owners themselves, seem to have a sixth sense for build-enabled plots. I've pointed this out in a friendly manner to several neighbours and those that have replied have been quite happy to turn on auto return, as they were blissfully unaware that junk was piling up on plots they never visit. _____________________ Logic : The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding - The Devil's Dictionary
Zepar Zhukovsky Leveraging Confusion Join date: 24 Oct 2006 Posts: 66	12-03-2007 11:10 "Please excuse my interruption 'large landowner'. /me debases self. I come before your holiness to beg a question. There is a residential rental in 'aSim' that your Grace has set to "anyone can build". Knowing that you are infallible omnipotent one, I suspect one of your minions has failed to do your bidding. Would it be possible for you to send a servant to come and return a couple of items and maybe set it to group only so that the land will continue to reflect your perfection? I would be most grateful and will sacrifice a goat or even a new calf to you at the next quarter moon. /me debases self again and awaits your answer." Actually, I don't think there was much wrong with what you said but It was this sentence "Not sure what the policy is for your rentals but would prefer it didn't get very messy." that produced the response.
FD Spark Prim & Texture Doodler Join date: 30 Oct 2006 Posts: 4,697	12-03-2007 11:51 Maybe it is intentional including the rudeness for you to sell the land to them? It seems like some people do this as intentional legal act of grief type activity because they know they can. _____________________ Look for my alt Dagon Xanith on Youtube.com Newest video is Loneliness by Duo Zikr DX's Alts & SL Art Death of Avatar

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An unexpected reaction...