The House of B'jor Show #3 - Dr McCoy & Spock

*The following program is for mature audiences only. The views expressed on this show are in no way a reflection of the Second Life Forums, Linden Labs, Second Life or anyone's save their own. Enjoy!*

Announcer (Mr. Wood) - "Rising up from obscurity, running threw the fields of doubt, and dodging the pies of outrageous misfortune, We Welcome you all to The House Of B'jor Show! Who writes this junk?"

*APPLAUSE*

B'jor Jlen - "Greetings all and welcome once again to another exciting show at my House. Thank you all for coming again. Before I go any further, I would like to thank both Linden Labs and these Second Life Forums for allowing us to make our new home here. As some of you may already know, this show was broadcast from the stratics.com forums. However as the rent there was outrageous we decided to make our home here instead as the price was just right. Again thank you all very much an I hope you enjoy the show."

Mr. Wood - "Kiss a$$"

BJ - "Sigh. In addition please welcome our new special guest Announcer, Mr. Wood. Will you all please give it up and give him a round of applause."

*APPLAUSE*

Mr.W - "Ahhh shut up all you pencil neck geeks! I don't like brown noses, an this place is starting to stink of em."

BJ - "Yes well, sorry about that folks. Mr. Wood is feeling a little crotchety today. You will have to forgive him."

Mr.W - "Crotchety my wrinkled white as..."

BJ - "On that note, today's show is a very special one. Today's topic is a simple one, but has affected this world more than all the tea in china. Today's topic is "Emotion" an we not only have one guest, but two instead! How cool is that huh? No neither of them is Governor Schwarzenegger unfortunately. He is still busy taking care of his office and as of this time is unavailable to be on this show. But we do have something just as good I believe. But before I introduce our very special guest's, I want to remind you all that again we will be playing "You bet your Life!"

BJ - "I am sure you all know how we play this game, but for those of you who don't please all me to explain. At the end of the show, I will be asking a very hard question. It is then up to our studio audience to IM me with the answer(s). Simple eh? This week, the FIRST three people who can IM Adam Cooper with the correct answer(s) will get $500L each! Yes you all heard me correctly. Today in celebration of our new home away from home, we will be giving away a total of $1.5k in funds!!! Is that awesome or what!"

Mr.W - "Or what..."

BJ - "Mr. Wood, please. This is a great opportunity for the studio audience to get some cold hard cash to buy that special gift they have always wanted but may not have been able to afford till now. Please show some respect ok?"

Mr.W - "Bah! They can respect my as...."

BJ - "Mr. Wood please! Anyways ladies an gentleman, boys an girls of all ages, as well as any and all space faring creatures from other worlds, please give a rousing hand for two of the most recognizable people in the galaxy! These two hail from the future believe it or not and come from the Star Trek universe. Please welcome Dr.Lenonard McCoy & Mr.Spock!!!"

*APPLAUSE*

*Dr.McCoy & Mr.Spock both come out from behind the curtain and sit down on the guest-sofa*

BJ - "Welcome, welcome both of you to the show."

Dr.McCoy - "Thank you Mr.Jlen for that kind introduction. It is great to be here."

Mr.Spock - "Correction Dr., it is not kind, but expected that Mr.Jlen introduce us both in the manner in which he did. In fact, according to my records of 21st century television & radio, it was quite common for a host to....."

Dr.M - "Spock?"

Mr.S - "Yes Dr. what is it?"

Dr.M - "Shuddap!"

Mr.S - "Dr. you cannot accept the fact that it is illogical to thank a host for something in which he is expected to do.... In fact...."

BJ - "Ahhhmmmm. Ok gentleman, it looks like I am going to have to play Captain Kirks part and keep you two from killing each other it seems. Please stay on topic an try not to get to worked up ok? We are all friends here after all."

Mr.M "Speak for yourself sonny."

Mr.S - "Indeed."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz"

BJ - "Sigh. You will have to please excuse Mr. Wood. He was up late partying with Pamela Anderson again. Them two have become quite the item you know."

Mr.S - "An item?"

Dr.M - "God man don't you know anything? He means they are going out with each other. You would know that if you took a vacation now and again."

Mr.S - "Dr.McCoy. As I have no need for enjoyment or companionship, I fail to see the logic of taking a vacation. I prefer to be at my station. Besides, remember what happened the last time I went on vacation?"

Dr.M - "Boy do I. You were hanging upside down from a tree branch looking down the dress of a gorgeous blonde who just happened to want you. An you say I'm cold?"

Mr.S - "Correction Dr. I called you a quack."

Dr.M - "Why you heartless, cold blooded......"

BJ - "Gentleman please. This is a family show after all. And please stay on topic if you could. Thank you."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz"

BJ - "Ok then gentleman, Please tell us all your views on this thing we humans call Emotion if you will."

Mr.S - "It is illogical."

Dr.M - "Of course it is you green blooded Vulcan! Human emotion is anything but logical. Hate, fear, desire, aggravation, bitterness, hope, an of course the most powerful one of them all, Love is what makes us what we are. Without emotion, the human race would have never reached for the stars."

Mr.S - "Never had wars."

Dr.M - "Yes Spock that to is one thing I will agree on. Emotion has caused a lot of pain an suffering threw out history absolutely, but it has also elevated us to greatness. Take love for instance."

Mr.S - "No thank you Dr."

BJ - "Mr.Spock, while I do respect you greatly an often times find your logic flawless, I have to agree with Dr.McCoy. I would take love over logic any day of the week. Despite all the pain in the world, it would be a much darker place with out love in it."

Dr.M - "Here here."

Mr.S - "You make a illogical assumption Mr.Jlen. If your species had embraced logic instead of emotion, your history an future would not be so bloody."

BJ - "The future. That reminds me. Do you think either of you could give me the winning lotto numbers to next weeks drawing? Its a big pot an I'd really like to win it."

Mr.S - "That would be highly dangerous Mr.Jlen. That alone would disrupt the time continuum an our prime directive forbids it."

Dr.M - "In that we are in total agreement Spock. I'm a doctor not a fortune teller! I for one think that would be a very stupid idea. Besides B'jor, soon enough money will be the least of your problems."

BJ - "What do you mean Dr?"

Mr.S - "Doctor. Do not say another word."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz"

Dr.M - "Ok Spock I see your point."

BJ - "Drat. I was hoping for some inside trading secrets too. Oh well, win some loose some I always say. anyways, while you were both waiting back stage you both took the opportunity to read these forums a bit. Please share with us your viewpoints on the emotions expressed here if you could please."

Mr.S - "Certainly Mr.Jlen. I see mostly nothing but emotional drivel and pointless arguments. However I also see some very well written logical arguments debating issues and viewpoints. It is...... Interesting."

Dr.M - "Oh come on Spock. People are just people, and everyone is human here."

Mr.S - "I fail to see the need to insult me doctor. I as you have often pointed out, am not human."

Dr.M - "That’s true Spock. Your a computer!"

Mr.S - "Thank you doctor. I accept your apology."

Dr.M - "Spock I was not apologizing. God man you just don't get do you. Human nature is to feel. It may be good, bad, or ugly but it is human, an I for one wouldn't have it any other way. I'd much rather spend my time with a emotional person than with a pocket calculator such as yourself."

Mr.S - "That can be arranged doctor. I find living with humans and there emotions distasteful."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. That’s right baby, I like it when you do that. More to the left."

BJ - "Do you see any favoritism or politicizing on these forums? In addition, how can these forums be made to be better then they already are?"

Mr.S - "Within any power base in history it has been shown that amongst many cultures, this does indeed exist. To what extent this occurs here I cannot answer as of this time because it requires more research."

Dr.M - "No research is needed spock, just a good dose of common sense. Does those things happen here? Yes. Why? Because we are all human, an human nature indicates that in most any group or organization, a pecking order does indeed exist. I only glanced at the forums so I can't tell anyone who, what, or where it is an quite frankly its not really important. We are all human here, save for the walking dictionary sitting beside me, an human nature comes in all colors. I hate politics, an quite frankly, I don't really care about the forums. I'm more concerned with saving lives. After all, I'm just a simple ol' country doctor, not a politician."

Mr.S - "Simple is a accurate description."

Dr.M - "Why you green blooded, pointy eared, hobgoblin! I don't care if you are Jim's best friend, when we get back to the Enterprise, I am going to schedule you for a anal probe!!! That will get the bug out of you a$$!"

Mr.S - "Doctor please. Your emotional outburst is unbecoming a officer of your stature! You are and will always be a quack."

Dr.M - "Spock you can just suck my....."

BJ - "Gentleman please!!! Lets keep this civil shall we?"

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. Ohhhh nice technique but let Woody show you how its really done......"

*Suddenly there is the sound of a Hum an the shimmering of a star Trek transporter. Within moments Captain James T Kirk materializes with a cross look on our face*

Captain Kirk - "Gentleman........... that is.......... enough. I do believe............ you two......... are through....... here."

Mr.S - "Yes Captain."

Dr.M - "What’s up Jim!"

Captain K - "I just received......... a message from Starfleet....... indicating that there are........ the beginnings of a...... temporal flux........ in the making. I have........ no idea what trouble........ you two are getting........ into here, but I have........ been ordered to pick you up........ an take you home. Besides...... we are late for that......... meeting........ with the Orion’s already. Time to........ go."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. Oww you bit me bitch. You will pay for that! No more wood for you!"

*Shaking his head slowly BJ stands up*

BJ - "Thaddy!!! What’s up babe!!!"

*All at once Captain Kirk launches pattered flying Kirk tackle at BJ, knocking him to the ground an the wind out of him*

Captain K - "There we....... go. No......... more obstacles. Lets be........ off........ shall we?"

Mr.S - "Aye Captain."

Dr.M - "Sure enough Jim."

Captain K - "Oh...... an Bones?"

Dr.M - "Yes Jim?"

Captain K - "I heard...... what you said......... about the anal........... probe on Spock. I will take....... care of that....... one myself........ right Spock?"

Mr.S - "As you wish Captain."

*With a nod Captain Kirk pulls out his communicator, an with a flip opens an activates it*

Captain K - "Scotty.......... come in please......."

Mr. Scott - "Captain ye need to hurry. The engines are strained to the limit an I don't know how much longer I can keep the lass together. The strain is tearing her apart! Ye must hurry!!!"

Captain K - "Don't get......... your skirt twisted.......... into a knot Scotty......... we are.......... now on our way. Three to....... beam up. Take us........ home."

Mr.W - "Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. Spanking time!!!"

*APPLAUSE*

*Again there is the sound of a Hum an the shimmering of a star Trek transporter. Within moments Captain James T Kirk, Mr.Spock, and Dr.McCoy are gone*

*Groaning, B'jor Jlen picks himself off the ground an brushes himself off*

BJ - "Well that certainly made for a memorable moment on our show. Well it looks like that’s all for our show today folks, but before we leave you, its time for "You bet your Life"!!! Today’s question is?"

*B'jor looks at the sleeping Mr. Wood an waits*

BJ - "Sigh."

*Grabbing a pencil from his desk, he throws it at Mr. Wood which it then sticks in his arm!*

BJ - "Mr. Wood!!! Wake up!!!."

Mr.W - "Oww! WTF! You stuck me with a pencil you pencil neck!!! I'm going to kick your a$$ for that one!!! Come here an take your medicine!"

BJ - "Mr. Wood please. You are the announcer an its your job now to announce the "You bet your Life" question to our studio audience."

Mr.W - "They can kiss my a$$ for all I care! Get over here so we can play my version of "You bet your Life"! Right now I wouldn't bet your going to live after that assault! Come here sonny Jim!!! Ol Mr. Wood has some thing special for your a$$."

*B’jor slowly starts backing away from a very angry Mr. Wood*

BJ - "Ok ok I'll ask the question. Today’s question is this. IN ALL THE STAR TREK MOVIES AN THE CLASSIC TREK SERIES, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE CAPTAIN KIRK BEEN TRANSPORTED THREW TIME AND WHAT WERE THE NAMES OF THE MOVIES/EPISODES IT HAPPENED IN?"

Mr.W - "What ya running for sonny? Ya chicken an not man enough to take your medicine or something? Its not going to hurt..... much!"

BJ - "Well that’s our cue folks! Please IM me with your answers ASAP. Next week at the latest I will reveal the winners here so they can be congratulated and presented with there winnings....... Remember folks I need the complete names of the episodes/movies and all of them. Again the FIRST 3 people who can IM Adam Cooper with the correct answer(s) will get $500L each! Hopefully you all enjoyed the show today and hope you all want more. Perhaps next time Governor Schwarzenegger can make it. It would be nice to finally have him on the show."

*Mr. Wood swings his cane at B'jor, but he misses an clears B’jor deck in one sweep*


Mr.W - "Come here pencil neck. I have some lead for yaw! Its spanking time!!!"

BJ - "Mr. Wood please I did not mean it to stick ya in the arm, really I didn't! Take care folks, and as always, Peace......"

Mr.W - "I'll give ya peace all right!!!"

*swing*

BJ - "Oww! Now cut that out!!!"

Mr.W - "I'm just getting warmed up!!! Stay still!!!"

BJ - "Oh sure! That’s a good idea! Not!!! SHAZZAM"

*APPLAUSE*

*The proceeding program was for mature audiences only. The views expressed on this show are in no way a refection of the Second Life Forums, Linden Labs, Second Life or anyone's save their own. We hope you have enjoyed this program!*