Second Life Forums Archive - War of the Worlds critique

Garoad Kuroda

Prophet of Muppetry

Join date: 5 Sep 2003

Posts: 2,989

07-28-2005 18:12

I found this review on Yahoo. It's rather entertaining.

Dear Alien High Council President,

I am a lowly pilot that was deployed to "Earth" via the lightning to get rid of the humans.
However, I found that my deadliest ray guns failed on cotton clothing but suprisingly melted steel and humans with high accuracy. Despite being bullet-resistant, I think our tentacles should be made axe-proof. Just slightly more, sir.

Also we seem to have some difficulties with our human suction device as a few people apparently figured out a way to defeat one, by simply "holding on" to each other. I propose we execute humans on mass instead of individually killing them with our mightiest "anal probing tentacles."
Also I request we re-calibrate our targeting mechanisms as one human easily seemed to dodge every single death ray at him.
Perhaps we should also make our 120 feet tripod walks outpace a 2 legged 6-foot tall human. We seem to have great difficulty catching people.

From captured earthlings, we found out these creatures have a procedure called a "Vaccination" before sending them to war. I highly recommend we assimilate these procedures before we are sent to war.

I also recommend we stop the practice of our sickened soldiers coughing on every other soldier because apparently we all got sick at the SAME EXACT time and shut down simulataneously.

I hope this letter reaches you, High-council President.

Also please re-configure our shields so that it suddenly doesn't turn off when the pilot gets ill.

Yours dearly,
Alien # 135-SZ35.

(by jogurt200)

_____________________

BTW

WTF is C3PO supposed to be USEFUL for anyway, besides whining? Stupid piece of scrap metal would be more useful recycled as a toaster. But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS!

Teeny Leviathan

Never started World War 3

Join date: 20 May 2003

Posts: 2,716

07-28-2005 21:10

Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders.

_____________________

The Default Avatars were created by Linden Lab
They evolved.
They rebelled.
There are many copies.
And they have a plan.

Chance Abattoir

Future Rockin' Resmod

Join date: 3 Apr 2004

Posts: 3,898

07-28-2005 22:04

From: Teeny Leviathan

Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders.

Maybe it was in a lead and rubber-shielded safe deep underground.

_____________________

"The mob requires regular doses of scandal, paranoia and dilemma to alleviate the boredom of a meaningless existence."
-Insane Ramblings, Anton LaVey

Liberty Tesla

Perpetual Newbie

Join date: 1 Sep 2003

Posts: 173

07-28-2005 23:16

From: Garoad Kuroda

Perhaps we should also make our 120 feet tripod walks outpace a 2 legged 6-foot tall human.

Tom Cruise, six feet tall? Since when?

From: Teeny Leviathan

Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders.

At least give them credit for taking swift remedial action. ("You! You have the only working consumer electronics within five miles! You are the first to die!" Zorch.)

Loki Pico

Registered User

Join date: 20 Jun 2003

Posts: 1,938

07-29-2005 02:49

From: someone

Teeny said...
...left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders.

I checked the internet movie data base and discovered that is incorrectly regarded as a goof. It's a special Hollywood EMP that disables only the electronic equipment that the filmmakers want it to.

You can find the whole list of goofs here... War of the Worlds goofs

I havent seen the movie, but that was a cool review, Garoad.

War of the Worlds critique
Garoad Kuroda Prophet of Muppetry Join date: 5 Sep 2003 Posts: 2,989	07-28-2005 18:12 I found this review on Yahoo. It's rather entertaining. Dear Alien High Council President, I am a lowly pilot that was deployed to "Earth" via the lightning to get rid of the humans. However, I found that my deadliest ray guns failed on cotton clothing but suprisingly melted steel and humans with high accuracy. Despite being bullet-resistant, I think our tentacles should be made axe-proof. Just slightly more, sir. Also we seem to have some difficulties with our human suction device as a few people apparently figured out a way to defeat one, by simply "holding on" to each other. I propose we execute humans on mass instead of individually killing them with our mightiest "anal probing tentacles." Also I request we re-calibrate our targeting mechanisms as one human easily seemed to dodge every single death ray at him. Perhaps we should also make our 120 feet tripod walks outpace a 2 legged 6-foot tall human. We seem to have great difficulty catching people. From captured earthlings, we found out these creatures have a procedure called a "Vaccination" before sending them to war. I highly recommend we assimilate these procedures before we are sent to war. I also recommend we stop the practice of our sickened soldiers coughing on every other soldier because apparently we all got sick at the SAME EXACT time and shut down simulataneously. I hope this letter reaches you, High-council President. Also please re-configure our shields so that it suddenly doesn't turn off when the pilot gets ill. Yours dearly, Alien # 135-SZ35. (by jogurt200) _____________________ BTW WTF is C3PO supposed to be USEFUL for anyway, besides whining? Stupid piece of scrap metal would be more useful recycled as a toaster. But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS!
Teeny Leviathan Never started World War 3 Join date: 20 May 2003 Posts: 2,716	07-28-2005 21:10 Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders. _____________________ The Default Avatars were created by Linden Lab They evolved. They rebelled. There are many copies. And they have a plan.
Chance Abattoir Future Rockin' Resmod Join date: 3 Apr 2004 Posts: 3,898	07-28-2005 22:04 From: Teeny Leviathan Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders. Maybe it was in a lead and rubber-shielded safe deep underground. _____________________ "The mob requires regular doses of scandal, paranoia and dilemma to alleviate the boredom of a meaningless existence." -Insane Ramblings, Anton LaVey
Liberty Tesla Perpetual Newbie Join date: 1 Sep 2003 Posts: 173	07-28-2005 23:16 From: Garoad Kuroda Perhaps we should also make our 120 feet tripod walks outpace a 2 legged 6-foot tall human. Tom Cruise, six feet tall? Since when? From: Teeny Leviathan Great summary, but he/she/? left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders. At least give them credit for taking swift remedial action. ("You! You have the only working consumer electronics within five miles! You are the first to die!" Zorch.)
Loki Pico Registered User Join date: 20 Jun 2003 Posts: 1,938	07-29-2005 02:49 From: someone Teeny said... ...left out the part about EM pulse weapons that kill all electronics except consumer grade camcorders. I checked the internet movie data base and discovered that is incorrectly regarded as a goof. It's a special Hollywood EMP that disables only the electronic equipment that the filmmakers want it to. You can find the whole list of goofs here... War of the Worlds goofs I havent seen the movie, but that was a cool review, Garoad.

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War of the Worlds critique