Cat Terror Incident??

Terror struck home in the small town of Millwood, Wisconsin as a cat ruthlessly attacked a bird yesterday. Sheriff Doug Bungy said, "It was carnage, that's what it was. A more monstrous crime has never been committed here in all the three hundred years our fine town has stood." Media outlets were quick to jump on the terror bandwagon, with claims ranging from Dan Rather's story stating that the cat acted alone to Fox News's report that it was trained by Osama Bin Laden to attack small birds in Afghanistan.


Sure, they all LOOK innocent

Debbie Lynch was witness to the carnage. "I saw the cat, it looked like one of them normal cats, you know, and it stalked the bird. I thought it was looking at the bird like a person looks at a painting in a fancy museum, then there was the blood and the screaming and the gore. Only now do I truly know the horror of war", she said.

Investigators on the scene have taken forensic swabs and called in specialist counselors to deal with local trauma. George Mellors, who runs the local hardware store said, "We have had nothing like this here, ever. This used to be a quiet town. Now it is the very epicenter of hell. Its like something out of a Stephen King book, apparently. I dont read but my daughter do."

The cat was believed to have fled the area by jumping over a fence and hiding in some shrubs. Anyone with further information should contact the FBI.

The following information has been posted in all local post offices, police stations, and pet shops:

Description ; Cat. About a foot long. Walks on all fours. Sometimes uses the name Tiddles. Has tail. Black and white. Approach with extreme caution or bowl of milk.

This is not the first time feline related terror has stalked the local streets. In November of last year, a small kitten was seen ruthlessly attacking a small woolen ball. According to an eyewitness, "the ball was just sitting there, and this kitten or whatever it was pounced". The ensuing chaos caused many innocent members of the public to step over the wool. Gordon Blacksmith commented, "I heard on the radio that there was an incident, and I went to see. The kitten seemed to be planning the attack, hiding in some shrubs, and then it leapt on the wool. There but for the grace of God go I", he said.

Also last November, a cat was seen lurking in a tree, and worried residents thought it could be a sniper. In December the town turned into a triple terror hot spot with the disclosure that a goldfish had been under surveillance from a small group of fur ball extremists for over half an hour. "This town isn't safe anymore" said one resident, who wished not to reveal his identity, "You can't walk down the street without some cat looking at you. You don't know if they're going to come up to you, expecting a pat on the head, a stroke or something altogether more sinister, like abuse. Who knows what "meow" means? It could be a signal for a terror outrage or a request for more tuna. Or, God forbid, a mixture of the two."

ok.. that wasn't any cat we know.

What a sad thing for kitties everywhere to be so maligned!!!

But it does remind me of a trauma that once hit the small seaside towm of Camden Maine when teenagers were becoming heavily involved in a very disruptive activity in the city park --> HACKY SACK kicking!!!!

Yes folks in the small village were upset and UP IN ARMS about the disruption of their quiet. Why how could they continue to inspire such dramas as Peyton Place when their concentration was being constantly interrupted by the knee trusting and heel smacking of the hacky sack kicking!!???

Go figure.

At the last place I lived, my cat knew all the neighborhood bird feeders and he would frequently hunt under them. He was always bringing me birds, or what was left of them. Once a week was common, sometimes more than that. It was always wild when he got a hold of a Blue Jay, all the other Jay's would gang up and scream and dive bomb him and cause a general neighborhood scene. He also brought me a lot of lizards, but thats another issue.

Ah, come on, not all of them are terrorists - some of them fight bravely side by side with our troops.

(This Picture came from: http://www.palletmastersworkshop.com/brave.html)

and notice how kitty doesn't need a gun...those claws do wonders


=^..^=

Were the lizards alive? 'Cause they really love you when they bring you a live one. My male cat brings them into me on a regular basis. Drops them right on my feet or in my lap.

He decided to REALLY demonstrate his love for me one day though and brought in a BIG LIVE warf RAT- which he tossed into the shower with me.

Since then I've felt pretty lucky when he just brings in the odd live lizard.



.

Weapons of Mass Destruction???

http://www.flashplayer.com/games/kittencannon_movie.php