SL and Crash N WIN

Introducing Crash and Win by JWA…


Yes that’s right folks the next time you cross a border in a JWA Hover craft you may be a big winner.
JWA introduces the Crash and Win Hover Board.
Your next experience crashing across a Sim line may bring you tons of Cash and Recognition.
Heralded as the newest form of fun in SL the CW Hover board is designed to bring a smile to your face while your poor avatar is mutilated and distorted.


Lets look at some of our pleased customers…

Aimee Weber…. ”I just couldn’t believe it Shadow gave me one and off I went cruising along at top speed and WHAM a Sim line. Whilst removing the glass from my ass I looked up to see the Win ticket floating above my destroyed hover board. I couldn’t believe it I had won 1,000 lindens.”

Nolan Nash…… ”Shadow is a really nice guy and all but these boards of his suck. I bought one and tried like hell to crash it but to no avail I haven’t crashed yet. But I hear there are 10,000 linden tickets in those things so I am going to continue trying to wreck it.”

Willow Zander….. ”I heard about his boards, I didn’t believe it though I mean after all I am a Sloot not a dumb blond so I got one and OMG it’s true they are crash and win. I was wiping the blood off of my brow and bum and lo and behold there where my new board once was floated an L$5,000 ticket. Thank you Crash n Win.

Unhygienix Gullwing…”Hmmpf, all the support I give him and look at this damn hover board…I have tried and tried to crash it and to no avail it has not Crashed but I’m still trying….wonder what I will win??”

Chip Midnight…” I didn’t even have to cross a Sim line I hopped on it and it exploded. While dusting myself off there floated a L$100 Linden winning ticket.”

Cristiano Midnight….”My girl and I were flying along as we got the two-seated version and boom. It happened the board just went out from under us as we crossed the Sim line. I smacked a billboard for Nephs while my lady I don’t know where she went. To my amazement behind me floating meters above the billboard was an L$4,000 ticket. Needless to say I scrambled back to get it.”

Kris Ritter….” I told Shadow I don’t cross Sim lines so what’s the point of me riding it. Anyway he convinced me and I got on no sooner than rolling over the mountain in my Sim it blew up. I was thrown 100 meters to the Sim border and broke every pixel in my avatar body…but I managed to contort the glob of my mutilated avatar body back to where the hover board exploded and an L$10,000 ticket was waiting there for me. Thank you JWA!”

Prokofy Neva….” I wanted to see what all the fuss was about since all the Feted were doing it I figured I would try one. Odd thing is though it keeps giving me a note saying your not Feted you can’t Win!!”
>>>Shrugs<<<<

Disclaimer: if you ask any of these people if these events happened they would deny it profusely as they signed a disclosure agreement when accepting the award check. Additionally they were offered a multiplier to keep their mouths shut. If you believe all of this I have 4 Sims in Arizona dirt-cheap.

LOL that was extremely well done, thank you Shadow

Why is it any discussion about me eventually wanders to my ass?


Oh, I'll take two Hover Boards please.

I don't think they're ready for that jelly.

Must be a slow day
Shadow

Shadow I think I have a job for you in the marketing dept. where I work!

If the salary has a 1 and 7 zeros (as in 5 zeros after it before the dot and the last two 00's) I may be interested..lol

*sticks a crisp new twenty dollar bill in shadow's g-string*

NOW DANCE FOR ME!

Um my break away tights are in the Cleaners can we do a rain check...

I like the ad copy, it's catchy.

LOL

I can't believe I missed this thread.

Now, where do I turn in the golden ticket Mr. Wonka?

Can you get me a date with Veruca?

Because it is so fine.

Woot! I can't wait to try again. What a rush. By the way Shadow, when can I check out that land in Arizona? I might be looking to relocate soon

Late breaking news >>>>>>>>>

JWA Announces that its being bought out by Linden Labs.

JWA’s Owner when questioned about the buy out said simply…” they had the lindens so I sold ….”

SLR Correspondent Cornered Philip Linden in world to question him about the buy out.

SLRC: Philip what’s this I hear about you buying out JWA’s Crash and Win Hoverboards?

Philip Linden: yes, while a motivational campaign that it is for members of Second Life. I can’t have Shadow Weaver turning around and suing us because we fixed a bug in 1.7 or later. So we decided to buy him out now.

SLRC: So in essence you paid him Hush money to stop offering Crash and Win Hoverboards?

Philip Linden: No! We made him an offer he can’t refuse and have encompassed the Crash and Win program under the LL umbrella.

<<< Meanwhile in a basement at Linden Lab Shadow Weaver’s Alt struggles to break free of his bonds.
He hears the door handle creak and looks up as Robin opens the door….

Robin: Look here we brought you some food. Are you hungry?

SLRC: So Philip is there any truth to you the rumors that you have Shadow’s Alt Under Lock and Key and if Shadow had not submitted to this buy out you were going to assassinate him.

Philip Linden: Do I look like a killer to you I mean come on people grow up this is the metaverse in the making. Not some knuckle dragging White Trash Trailer park in the middle of Kansas.

SLRC: So you are denying those claims?

Philip Linden: What part of no did you not understand?

SLRC: Thank you Mr. Linden now back to SLR for more breaking news on this story.

Guess this went over like a Ton of Lead....anyone got a Lead to Gold Machine???