Why I am still reading these forums

in spite of myself knowing better, I still come by these fourms and take a look, kind of like one of the kids who keeps going back to that place by the old mill pond to look at the dead hobo. My hat is off to those of us who also keep poking the body with a stick.

For some reason it has made me carry out the following mental exercise:

Fill in the blanks in this phrase:

"If these forums were ____________ , by now I would have ___________________."

Here are my contributions:

"If these forums were Old Yelller, by now I would have taken it out behind the farm house and ended the suffering."

"If these forums were a 1979 Oldsmobile, by now I would have spray painted funny sayings on the doors and roof and entered it in a small county fair demolition derby."

"If these forums were a rusty, bulging can of soup with no label, by now I would have thought long and hard about who I would like to try feeding the contents to, before finally double-bagging the thing while wearing rubber gloves and taking it to the annual town toxic waste collection day."

Anyone have any other suggestions?

If these forums were closed already, by now I would have done something more constructive with my day?

Sun.

If these forums were a car accident, I just couldn't look away...

If these forums were controlled they would not be closing.

If these forums were not here, by now I would not have felt such a part of Second Life.